Justin Bieber and Chris Brown – Hetero Doctors With Yellow Cars And Skinny Jeans

Two of America’s most equally loved and hated people have made a song together! Chris Brown and Justin Bieber, where they both rap about ladies, cars,  jeans and Louie Vuitton hightops? Great job convincing me that you are in fact NOT straight, or perhaps the most effeminate duo since Milli Vanilli. Which, for the record, I’d rather listen any day over this.

Justin calls himself “Shawty Mane,” and debuted this side of himself in October of last year. Apparently these two cold sores feel like torturing America. If you want to just skip to the Bieber part, since that’s the most humorous, go to the 1:08 mark. There’s even a part of the song where Chris simply states “Man my house is so big,” as if it were just a normal thing to say. Maybe it is a normal thing to say, if you’re a rich, cocky, blonde imitation-Michael Jackson dancing Rihanna-beating mofo.

Here are some of my favorite lyrics from the song.

Baby I’m yo docta,
I could be yo rocker,
Swaggin’ I’m not braggin’
But I swear that I could rock ya
Baby I’m not crazy,
I got swag like Patrick Schwayze.


Ladies love me
I’m on my Cool J
Yellow model chick
Yellow bottle sippin’
Ladies love me
I’m on my Cool J
Yellow Lamborghini
Yellow top missin’


I am hetero,
baby you better know Jb is generally just JB
look at me
No, I said look at me,
Swaggin’ with the crooked teeth.


I’ma gentleman
Yes I’ma gentleman,
I’ma on my element,
but I’m still elegant
I’m full of adrenaline,
You know what that means
Louie V hightops with the skinny jeans.


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