Kardashians Cover Biggie’s ‘Hypnotize’

One of the most shocking moments in my young life came in the form of a harmless walk in the woods behind my house. I had taken to lifting rocks in the hopes of examining interesting bugs, usually ants or the occasional red centipede.

On this comfortably cool summer day on the Oregon Coast I lifted a particularly large rock and discovered a nest of baby snakes. They startled me mostly because there were so many and they moved so quick and pointlessly.

When I see the Kardashian-Jenner family I am reminded of that day. This is a group of creatures that never stop working, but for what cause I do not know. 

Here is a prime example of the pointlessness, a video of them doing Notorious B.I.G.’s “Hypnotize” Chris Brown style, in revealing swimwear. Well, Bruce isn’t in a bikini but he is slapping Kris Jenner‘s ass.

That sounds exactly like something you DON’T want to see, but secretly you are curious. Kim Tweeted a link to it on Saturday writing, “Our newest family music video!!! Hypnotize by B.I.G. Shot in the Dominican Republic!!!”

Gosh, I really hope no one edits the part where Rob is humping the air into the bit where Kim dips her ass into the water repeatedly, ’cause I already made the picture version.

The Biggie video is the sequel (I guess) to their Lady Marmalade video, filmed in December of 2011.

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