Stories I’m Too Lazy To Write About [10-29-12]

Avengers director Joss Whedon gives tips on running from Zombies after Romney is elected. (Kotaku)

Michael Phelps tried to crowd surf in an inflatable raft, fell on his ass. (Deadspin)

Palin kryptonite Levi Johnston married to Sunny Oglesby, mother of Breeze Beretta. (TMZ)

Hurricane Sandy gives Mayor Bloomberg an actual boner. (Jezebel)

Knox, Vivienne and Shiloh look miserable on shopping trip with broodmother Jolie. (Celebuzz)

Justin Bieber gets owl tattoo, tells Oprah he isn’t ashamed of Selena Gomez. (Daily Mail)

Ellen makes Jerry O’Connell strip in the name of cancer research. (ohmyGAHH!)

Zooey Deschanel belts out the National Anthem at game three of the World Series. (Evil Beet)

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