Tiger Woods Acts a Fool, Turns Into Cross-Eyed Mongoloid With a Wine Cooler Addiction

Tiger Woods drunk faceProfessional ball-slapper Tiger Woods showed the world his drunk face during a Met Gala after-party at the Standard Hotel in New York.

Girlfriend/pro slope hitter Lindsey Vonn looked both amused and embarrassed as she led his wobbly baby deer legs and bouncing pinball eyes through the crowds of press and fellow celebs.

The succession of photos tell a story. First, he realizes he’s lost control of the muscles in his face and body and his last drunken resort is to not change his expression. Eyes and mouth open. Show some teeth. Maybe they won’t notice…

Then he gives up. Everyone knows he’s wasted. The bloodshot eyes and wax figure pose did more than hint at that. They’re onto me. JESUS Lindsey, get me home before Elin sees. 

Tiger Woods Drunk face 3Tiger Woods Drunk face 1
From Us Weekly:

At one point in the evening, the once-divorced golfer got up to dance awkwardly, bopping from side to side and grabbing Vonn’s butt affectionately as she giggled.

When it was time to go, around 2 a.m., a seemingly tipsy Woods fell while walking up a small flight of stairs—and didn’t move from the spot until Vonn, clenching her teeth and looking embarrassed, helped him up and guided him (swaying a bit as he walked) to the exit, according to a witness.

Tiger Woods drunk face 4Tiger Woods drunk

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