Howard Stern Doesn’t Think Natalia Kills Should Have Been Fired

Natalia Kills Howard SternAmerican’s Got Talent judge Howard Stern has weighed in on the Natalia Kills / Willy Moon firing over at The X Factor New Zealand.

Like the rest of the United States, Stern and Robin Quivers barely knew who Natalia was (Quivers accidentally called her “Natalie”). Stern thought Natalia and her husband went too far, but didn’t agree with them being fired because “they asked for her opinion.”

“They were outrageous,” Stern said. “They made a personal attack on a guy who didn’t deserve it. I felt the two judges were just a**holes.”  Continue reading “Howard Stern Doesn’t Think Natalia Kills Should Have Been Fired”

Former Hugh Hefner Girlfriend Contemplated Suicide

Holly madison hefnerHugh Hefner’s most famous (and oldest?) girlfriend has written a tell-all book detailing her time at the Playboy Mansion.

In Down The Rabbit Hole, 35-year-old Holly Madison apparently describes living at the mansion and being with Hef as a “nightmare” that ultimately led to her “sitting alone in a bathtub contemplating suicide.”  Continue reading “Former Hugh Hefner Girlfriend Contemplated Suicide”

Ellie Goulding And Taylor Swift Are Getting Drunk Together While Everyone Else Drinks Tea

Ellie Goulding Taylor Swift Selena Gomez HaimDancing Man fan Ellie Goulding (really loving “Outside” and “Heavy Crown” right now), Taylor Swift, Selena Gomez and members of the indie/rock group Haim had an epic all-celebrity girl tea party today, except someone wasn’t drinking tea.

Two someones, actually…

As you can see, Ellie and bestie/Taylor Swift, giggling in the corner and mowing down on some alcohol.

I wonder how Coke would feel about Taylor enjoying rum with their product?

Ronda Rousey Expresses Interest in Fighting Holly Holm After Submitting Zingano

Holly Holm vs Ronda Rousey“Rowdy” Ronda Rousey (add about a million y’s to that for a solid Bruce Buffer impersonation) told Joe Rogen in her post-fight interview that she is interested in taking on UFC newbie Holly Holm.

“Holly Holm is a world champion boxer and I always want to test myself against that level of striking,” Rousey said.

Holm, 33, showed impressive striking and kickboxing technique in her debut earlier tonight against Raquel Pennington, who lost despite having considerably more experience with big-name fighters like Cat Zingano.   Continue reading “Ronda Rousey Expresses Interest in Fighting Holly Holm After Submitting Zingano”

Oscars ‘In Memoriam’ List DID NOT Include Joan Rivers

joan and melissa rivers first red carpet interviewThe 87th Academy Awards had plenty of time for a guitar-playing Batman, Sean Penn making green card jokes and embarrassing Dakota Johnson, but NO time for their longtime employee, Joan Rivers. 

Rivers — a woman who epitomized show business and the Oscars in general — was snubbed from the show’s In Memoriam segment that included and multiple marketing directors, producers and sound editors.

Let me remind you that at one time, Joan was the only one who did red carpet commentary. She is also the the inventor of “Who are you wearing?”, not to mention a very accomplished comedian, writer, actress and co-host.  Continue reading “Oscars ‘In Memoriam’ List DID NOT Include Joan Rivers”

Emma Watson and Prince Harry Aren’t a Thing

Hermione mud bloodSo you heard that Emma Watson and Prince Harry are an item, yes? Well, they’re not. Firstly, Watson is a classy young broad who I’d like to believe has much better taste than that, and second, she said so on Twitter (sort of).

But then again, I wanted to believe that Hermione Granger wouldn’t fall for a certain sweet-yet-clueless ginger with a knack for being dead weight when people are busy trying their hardest to destroy Voldemort. Lesson: anyone lacking the last name “Potter” or “Radcliffe” is a bad choice for her.

Here’s what Watson had to say on social media about not dating a full-blood prince:

The “exclusive” story from Women’s Day Australia detailed a tryst that thrived on “secret dates” and the fact that Harry is “smitten” for more than just “Emma’s looks,” and is instead after her soul because he doesn’t have one.  Continue reading “Emma Watson and Prince Harry Aren’t a Thing”

Azealia Banks Posing For Internet-Breaking Playboy Photos

Playboy is employing Azealia Banks for an upcoming shoot. Banks is famous for songs like “212,” getting into Twitter feuds, and being a rapper who often gets confused with Iggy Azalea (who she affectionately calls “Itchy Areola”) despite not being white or Australian.

Banks will be interviewed by Rob Tannebaum within the April 2015 issue and photographed by Ellen Von Unwerth, whose portfolio includes compromising photos of Rihanna, Christina Aguilera, Beyoncé and Janet Jackson.  Continue reading “Azealia Banks Posing For Internet-Breaking Playboy Photos”

Unretouched Photos of ‘Regular Woman’ Beyoncé Promptly Removed From Internet

unretouched beyonce Over the years, we’ve loved and scrutinized Beyoncé to Oprah-sized proportions.

I get alerts on my phone informing me when her roots grow and if she may or may not have bunions. And if she does have a bunion, I want to know exactly which foot and the exact location in latitude and longitude.

Which brings me to a website that released not one or two but a whopping 224 unretouched photos of the singer.  Continue reading “Unretouched Photos of ‘Regular Woman’ Beyoncé Promptly Removed From Internet”

Gaga’s Engagement Ring is a Bloody Giant Heart

lady gaga ringJust Kidding.

Lady Gaga of the meat dress-having, singing-while-covered-in-blood and eating-designer-cakes-dripping-with-red-dye persuasion, did NOT receive anything crazy for her engagement, but she did get a completely normal heart-shaped ring from her boyfriend, television firefighter and werewolf Taylor Kinney, for Valentine’s.

Kidding again. Gaga’s ring isn’t normal, it’s huge and probably worth a million dollars. The biggest shock here is one of the following multiple choice options:

1.  You can buy a ring like this at almost any high-end jewelry store.
2. Nobody was hired to pry it from the cold dead fingers of Alexander McQueen
3. Gaga is marrying not only a human man from Earth, but a pretty regular guy

 

 

 

 

 

Kanye is ‘Definitely’ Recording With Taylor Swift

taylor swift kanye memeWhat kind of world am I living in? Apparently one where Kanye West and Taylor Swift bury the hatchet by recording sweet sweet music together.

Kanye hasn’t recorded sweet sweet music since 2010, and while I doubt a country/pop crossover with Taylor is the answer, it’s still astounding that he says he’s for sure going to make sure going to make music with the girl who’s moment he ruined on behalf of Beyonce all those years ago.  Continue reading “Kanye is ‘Definitely’ Recording With Taylor Swift”

Brian Williams Suspended For 6 Months For Lying

Jon Stewart Brian Williams quoteNews anchor Brian Williams has been suspended by NBC for 6 months without pay for saying he was in a helicopter that had to make an emergency landing after coming under fire in Iraq.

To add insult to injury, Williams claimed he told the lie because umm, like, a bunch of helicopters crashed that day and stuff and he was in a helicopter but just not one of those helicopters and he forget that that totally didn’t happen to him at all because he’s got a lot going on, like trying to ignore trolls who send him videos of his daughter getting her ass eaten out.

Continue reading “Brian Williams Suspended For 6 Months For Lying”

Paul McCartney Enlists Gaga for ‘Secret Project’

Gaga Sir Paul instagramIn the past few years, former Beatle Paul McCartney has collaborated with a plethora of artists who were mere embryos when The White Album was recorded. Since “replacing” Kurt Cobain in the Nirvana reunion at the Grammys, Sir Paul has filmed “FourFiveSeconds” with Kanye West and Rihanna and now he’s working on a “secret project” with Lady Gaga, which makes sense since she’s always had a thing for talented old guys like Clarence Clemons, Tony Bennet and Brian May.

Gaga’s new “post sex” fragrance inspired by her sessions with McCartney is available at Target.

Continue reading “Paul McCartney Enlists Gaga for ‘Secret Project’”

Is Bruce Jenner Actually Becoming a Woman?

Bruce Jenner transitionAfter reading countless gossip articles telling us basically that the Jenner/Kardashian patriarch Bruce Jenner is becoming a woman all because he likes to wear his hair in a ponytail, I decided the “news” was probably nonsense, but finally, after seeing him with, as the Washington Post points out, long highlighted hair, a French manicure, diamond earrings and lip gloss and his own stepdaughter Kim Kardashian confirming that he’s filming a docuseries about his “journey,” it seems that yes, Bruce Jenner is actually becoming a woman.

An Us Weekly source alleges that Bruce has wanted to transition from male to female, or at least enjoyed wearing women’s clothing, since his Olympic golden days.  Continue reading “Is Bruce Jenner Actually Becoming a Woman?”

Video: The Weeknd – “Earned It”

At 4 minutes and 36 seconds, The Weeknd’s version of Fifty Shades of Grey is better than the movie. And instead of being summed up by an entire book with scenes featuring tampons and buttplugs that apparently turned on every woman in the world except me, this music video can be explained with a single gif of Dakota Johnson playing with The Weeknd’s hair tuft.
the weeknd hair dakota johnson
Ellie Goulding has also released a song from the weirdly good Fifty Shades soundtrack AND a bonus Nike campaign video of her running in tights. You’re welcome.

Stories I’m Too Lazy to Write About [1-28-15]

Paris Hilton monkey whacking it gif

 No man or monkey is immune to Paris Hilton‘s feminine charms. (Uproxx)

Amada Peet (wife of creator David Benioff) hates Game of Thrones(Gawker)

33% increase in people being idiots with guns at the airport since 2013. (Mental Floss)

Eat as much fat as you can because it‘s delicious keeps you young. (MaxWorkouts)

Woman born with adactylia talks pros and cons of Freakshow’s Lobster Boy. (Jezebel)

One of Blink 182‘s lead singers is still in the band but refuses to tour or record. (Spin)

Football-playing children will grow up braindead. Might I suggest ballet? (Time)

The new Ghostbusters movie is basically Bridesmaids 2 with ghosts. (CinemaBlend)