They May Take Our Lives, But They Can Never Take Our BREADSTICKS!

In Touch Weekly reports that Mel Gibson gave a waiter at Madeo in West Hollywood $100 dollars to go to a separate establishment and bring back some breadsticks because they didn’t serve them on weekends. (This was on February 24)

Apparently Gibson likes sticks of delicious butter, flour and yeast nearly as much as he likes offending people. That’s the great thing about Mel, he’s an equal-opportunity discriminator. Women, blacks, gays, Jews, cops, Mayans, Russians, beavers. Everyone’s a target.

But not breadsticks. You’ll never hear him yelling “What do you think you’re looking at, SaltyBits?” at his one true edible love. (I apologize for the bad sugartits pun and Braveheart pic, couldn’t help myself)

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Michael Vick’s New Contract, $100 Million For Six Years

ESPN is reporting that the Philadelphia Eagles have signed Michael Vick to a six-year deal worth $100 million, and around $40 million guaranteed, regardless of retirement or injuries.

Eagles coach Andy Reid said in a statement today regarding the contract,

“I’m very happy we were able to reach an agreement with Michael on this long-term contract…It’s a product of all the hard work Michael has done to better himself over the last couple of years, both on and off the field. I’m very proud that he has been able to achieve success again in this league, but he’ll be the first one to tell you that there is a lot of work yet to be done by him and this team as a whole.”

he then added,

“There’s no doubt in my mind that he will continue on that path.”
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This guy REALLY Likes Halo

July 25th 2011, on the surprisingly educational/entertaining History Channel show Pawn Stars, a man brought in a custom-made master chief suit and model assault rifle from the video game Halo.

The man, Ian, asked a mere $2,000 for the extravagantly nerdy item but that turd son of the Vegas-based Gold And Silver Pawn Shop owner Rick, Corey Harrison aka “Big Hoss,” wouldn’t give the poor man more than $200, originally offering a measly $100.

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