Ian Ziering Shows Off His 49-Year-Old Ginger Abs

Ian Ziering Chippendales dancer Ian Ziering, best known for his amazing work as the grandfather of all snobby rich kids on Beverly Hills 90210, can currently be seen by horny housewives and confused young lushes in Vegas as a Chippendales dancer.

He is joining the once-famous, spray-tanned likes of Jeff Timmons (of 98°) and Joey Lawrence, who danced the erotic night away in 2011 and 2012.

How much would you pay to see Ziering “use song, dance, striptease and body butter to play out an array of female fantasies”? Apparently others are shelling out $55.45.

I was willing to go to $55.50, but whatever. I just wanted to see if the 25-pound weight loss affected his dong.

Justin Bieber Sings, Flashes Abs and Makes Beliebers Laugh on SNL

Justin bieber abs SNL You know what the gym rats say. “Having abs because you’re skinny is like having big boobs because you’re fat.”

And it’s true. After a week of rehearsal, Justin Bieber brought his puny, effeminate Ken doll/Vanilla Ice lookin’ frame to Rockefeller Center for Saturday Night Live.

The monologue had me wishing Whoopi Goldberg, who made a cameo for Black History Month, had strangling-length dreads.

Here’s the issue. Justin didn’t try to be funny because he knows he doesn’t have to for his fans to say it was amazeballs. His mental and physical growth has been stunted by fame. Those vocals too. I mean, with that perma-cold, I could sing just as well.

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Everyone Wants To See Vice Presidential Candidate Paul Ryan In His Skivvies

On top of being compared to Sarah Palin due to his age (he’s 42) and good looks, the internet wants to see Mitt Romney’s running mate shirtless.

In fact, if you Google “Paul Ryan shirtless” images of Glee’s Matthew Morrison topless on the cover of Details Magazine come up, along with a bunch of other half-naked celebrities and sports figures.

Alas, no Paul Ryan.

We want a map of the abs, not his budget-cutting “Roadmap for America’s Future.”

TMZ even wrote that a source told them that he’s “totally ripped and has a six pack” and was featured on a list of the 50 Most Beautiful People on Capital Hill, 2008.  Continue reading “Everyone Wants To See Vice Presidential Candidate Paul Ryan In His Skivvies”

The Human Head Weighs 8 Pounds, And So Do Jonathan Lipnicki’s Abs

That adorable little nerd from Jerry Maguire is looming past his 15 minutes of fame, how is he doing it? By revealing half-naked pictures of himself, of course. He may be 21 but I still see him as a grinning blonde six year-old, hanging off Tom Cruise and Renée Zellweger, not a chin-up bar.

Alas I cannot freeze time and refuse children the right to grow up. And Jonathan Lipnicki has grown up, he’s transformed into a tiny, less-accomplished version of Ryan Reynolds. On his exercise regime, he told Us Weekly,

“The more results I saw, the more dedicated I became, it is such a great feeling to see your hard work pay off. I mean, if I’m gonna skip the In-N-Out burgers, there better be light at the end of the tunnel!…I work free-weights and do circuit training with my trainer 4-5 times a week, I also train in Brazilian Ju Jitsu several times a week.”

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Pattinsquatch Intimidated By Taylor Llamautner’s Bod

Elusive english Sasquatch Robert Pattinson revealed to the Latin magazine 15a20 that he was insecure about his sex scene with Kristen Stewart because of how hard Taylor Lautner (Llamautner) works out for his slutty werewolf role…

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