Beyonce Wants Jay-Z to ‘Turn Her Cherry Out’ and ‘Lick Her Skittles’ in New Song

Beyonce partition video still underwearBeyonce randomly released a new self-titled album on Thursday on iTunes without promoting it or mentioning the release date prior.

There are also 17, count ’em, SEVENTEEN new music videos and everyone’s talking about how only she and a handful of other mega famous artists could pull off such ballsy move, but what they’re failing to mention is that the CD is super raunchy.

In the absolutely filthy “Blow,” Bey sings “Can you lick my Skittles, that’s the sweetest in the middle, pink that’s the flavor,” “I can’t wait ’til I get home so you can turn that cherry out” and “give me that daddy long stroke.” Continue reading “Beyonce Wants Jay-Z to ‘Turn Her Cherry Out’ and ‘Lick Her Skittles’ in New Song”

Lady Gaga Reveals ARTPOP Tracklist

ARTPOP cover Lady Gaga has been quite the busy bee this week, unveiling her ARTPOP album art in Times Square as well as the entire 15-song tracklist and a new song from Robert Rodriguez’s Machete Kills soundtrack, which hits theaters tomorrow and features Gaga in her acting debut as the mysterious temptress La Chameleón.

The titles are a sort of personalized Scrabble board of obvious Gaga-esque obsessions (Versace, manicures, fashion) and super duper artsy stuff like drugs and wet dreams. Really Gaga, Mary Jane Holland? …Most obvious weed reference EVER.

1. Aura
2. Venus
3. G.U.Y.
4. Sexxx Dreams
5. Jewels N’ Drugs (featuring T.I., Too $hort, and Twista)
6. MANiCURE
7. Do What U Want (featuring R. Kelly)
8. ARTPOP
9. Swine
10. Donatella
11. Fashion!
12. Mary Jane Holland
13. Dope
14. Gypsy
15. Applause

Michelle Obama to Appear in Health-Conscious Hip Hop Videos

A slightly misleading but still incredible NME article says “US First Lady Michelle Obama to release hip-hop album.” Don’t get your hopes up too high, internet…

Mich O. won’t actually be singing on said album, she’s just organizing it for educational purposes. You know her deal, getting kids to replace delicious fried food with food that is good for you and tastes like unseasoned gelatinous hippie pit sweat (but at least makes you poop consistently).

Artists included on the compilation Songs For A Healthier America are Darryl ‘DMC’ McDaniels, Travis Barker, Ashanti, Doug E. Fresh, Jordin Sparks and Matisyahu.

Michelle will only be appearing in videos for songs like “U R What You Eat,” “Veggie Luv” and “Everybody” (download for free HERE if you dare and/or care), but I still keep imagining them turning out like this:

(Take it away, Mary Sue / Let his love bust a cap in your butt and say HALLELUJAH!) Or this: Continue reading “Michelle Obama to Appear in Health-Conscious Hip Hop Videos”

New Katy Perry Album ‘Prism’ Due Oct. 22

Katy Perry prism bus Katy Perry‘s PR team revealed the name and release date of her new album via gold semi truck. She says that “Los Angeles is just the first stop on the map,” so keep your eyes peeled and your finger on your iPhone camera app if you want to possibly end up being retweeted by Perry herself.

In case you’re partially blind or tweaking and couldn’t tell from the headline and picture Prism, will be available on October 22.

Perry and Bonnie McKee (Wiki her, she only wrote every hit off Teenage Dream) have been fairly tight-lipped about details but I’m sure you can expect plenty of sing-alongs to carry you through the dark seasons and into the boy and candy-filled summer of 2014.  Continue reading “New Katy Perry Album ‘Prism’ Due Oct. 22”

Gaga’s ARTPOP Gets Release Date & New Single!

Lady Gaga artpop mask Lady Gaga has popped out of a recording studio crevice to announce the release date of her third full-length album, ARTPOP. It is due on November 11, 2013, according to her Facebook. Seems like a long time but at least the Little Monsters will have a BRAND NEW single on August 19, 2013 to satiate their fanatical needs.

There’s also this Inez van Lamsweerde-shot photo of Gaga naked in a clear welding mask displaying her ARTPOP tat and unruly hair.

Lady G has been working with DJ White Shadow, RedOne and others since 2012 on a boatload of songs that will probably sound like Cher fell into a blender with My Little Pony and Strawberry Shortcake.

Scratch that and replace with Jem and the Holograms. Every time she describes the ARTPOP experience I think of Synergy introducing herself as a “holographic computer designed to be the ultimate audio-visual-entertainment synthesizer.”

God Help Us: Miley’s New Album ‘Sounds Like Her Personality’

Miley Cyrus V Magazine underwearSomebody’s been rummaging through Justin Bieber’s underwear drawer. Miley Cyrus dropped trou for V Magazine and talked about her new album and the rumors about her and Liam.

So much for her “A star is someone who doesn’t have to take her clothes off to be sexy” quote in Elle UK. V plays up the whole “she’s a new person because she cut her hair” thing, but I’m not buying it.

She looks like a new person, but she’ll always be Hannah Montana and the girl who ear-raped me with “Party in the U.S.A.” Speaking of that song, Miley still loves it, saying she’d never “take it back” because that would be like Billy Ray “saying that he hated ‘Achy Breaky.'”
Miley V magazine cover 2013Miley Cyrus V magazine cover 2013 Continue reading “God Help Us: Miley’s New Album ‘Sounds Like Her Personality’”

Justin Timberlake Hides Eyes, Sings About Bubblegum on ‘The 20/20 Experience’

The 20:20 experience coverOn the album cover for The 20/20 Experience, future-obsessed Justin Timberlake peers through one of those freaky optometrist torture devices.

Like Jessica Biel, it’s shiny, stiff and has a lot of knobs on it, which makes it just random enough to seem relevant even though it’s roughly 92 years old.

Question: If unfamous, untalented Justin Timerberlake was walking down the street, would you still glance his way?

If the answer is “yes,” I figure it’s because of those mesmerizing blue eyes, which are purposefully hidden on this cover. That’s just bad marketing. Play to the audience any less and it’s Joey Fatone.

Continue reading “Justin Timberlake Hides Eyes, Sings About Bubblegum on ‘The 20/20 Experience’”

Princess of Pop Working On ‘Personal,’ ‘Unexpected’ New Album

Scream and Shout BritneyBritney Spears‘ recording schedule has always been a bit erratic. She churned out an album for each of the first three years of her career, taking a breather after Britney (2001) and then In The Zone (2003) to get married, have kids, shave the old noggin’ and keep a watchful eye on Fanta and beef jerky sales at the gas station.

She returned for Blackout (2007, infamous “Gimme More” dance at the VMAs) and Circus (2008), then took a nearly three-year break before releasing Femme Fatale.

A Q&A with fans on Twitter indicates that a whole new CD full of Britney’s breathy “oohs” will actually come out sometime this year! Continue reading “Princess of Pop Working On ‘Personal,’ ‘Unexpected’ New Album”

$250 Dollars For Rihanna’s Box

Ladies and Harry Winston blunt-rolling germs, save your silver dollars. A limited edition copy of Rihanna‘s new album is going to set you back.

While the standard and deluxe versions of Unapologeticout November 16, will cost a regular $13.99 and $17.26, the “Diamonds Executive Platinum Box,” will cost $250.

It comes with a t-shirt, lithographs, vinyl with remixes and the “Diamonds” single, a 40-page booklet of lyrics and other scribblings,  2GB flash drive, a ViewMaster stocked with previously unreleased photos, stickers, and a handwritten note from Ms. BarbadoClownTastic herself.

Continue reading “$250 Dollars For Rihanna’s Box”

Is Lady Gaga’s New Album Called ‘ARTPOP?’

Lady Gaga posted a photo of her new “ARTPOP” arm tattoo (I’ve flipped the image so it no longer appears backwards) on Twitter, and the words “new ink new album.”

On her new social networking site Littlemonsters.com the photo was accompanied by a different message, “We could, we could belong together. ARTPOP.”

This is her fifth tattoo, and since we all know the story behind the ink on her left thigh (“Born This Way” and a unicorn), is it safe to assume that Artpop is the name of her third album? There’s a strong possibility, but I care less about the name and more about the theme. I’m hoping for less greasy Jesus-y ex-boyfriends in corn fields and more disco sticks.  Continue reading “Is Lady Gaga’s New Album Called ‘ARTPOP?’”

Stockholm Singer Soso Uses Pirate Bay To Release Album

I have to give major props to bold new Swedish pop artist Sophia “Soso” Somajo for releasing her debut album for free on the torrent website The Pirate Bay.

You can download The Time I Dug So Deep I Ended Up in China (T.T.I.D.S.D.I.E.U.I.C.) there or on her website, where she writes:

“I have written, produced and recorded this album in my bedroom. It’s the story of my life. Literally.”

“This project is an anti-social experiment pushing the boundaries of the music industry. I have even gone so far that I have left my major record label and started up my own. I call it: Do It Yourself Bitch Productions.”

In that very insightful and personal letter she also talks about going back to making music to simply be heard, and not resisting change – referring to the dying physical music industry and vitalized digital one.  Continue reading “Stockholm Singer Soso Uses Pirate Bay To Release Album”

New Garbage Album Tracklist And Cover Art

The official cover art and tracklisting for Garbage‘s first CD since 2005 has been revealed for my fanatic eyes to feast upon.

Not Your Kind Of People will be released on May 15th in standard edition, with eleven tracks.

The deluxe edition has simple red cover art with the band’s signature “G” instead of white, plus four bonus songs.

The lead single is “Blood For Poppies.”

Shirley, Butch and the gang are currently filming a video for it.
Continue reading “New Garbage Album Tracklist And Cover Art”

Metric’s New ‘Synthetica’ Album Will Be About Everything

Besides revealing the title, the simplistic but potentially epic “Synthetica,” which seems like it could have been their last album’s title, frontlady Emily Haines has written more about the CD’s content on the band’s website.

They’ve included a countdown to its release date on June 11 (it is their fifth album and first since 2009) plus a vague but somehow detailed description on the best kind of depravities.

Continue reading “Metric’s New ‘Synthetica’ Album Will Be About Everything”

New Killers Album In 2012, First In Four Years!

The first Killers album since 2008’s Day & Age is scheduled for 2012, Brandon Flowers has confirmed it. He says to expect a mix of the old and some new as well.

“I think the consensus within the band is to take those things that we’ve done well and really hone in on that, we don’t want to make Hot Fuss 2 or Sam’s Town 2, or Day & Age 2. We’ll maybe take all that stuff, the best of all of it and do what we know how to do.”

This is wonderful news for fans no matter what the album sounds like. A disappointing third Killers record not to mention the horribly crappy Brandon Flowers solo effort from 2010 had everyone wondering if the band was over.

Continue reading “New Killers Album In 2012, First In Four Years!”

A New Garbage Album Is Expected In March, 2012!

New music from Garbage is finally becoming a realization, nearly seven years after 2005’s Bleed Like Me, not to mention rumors of a full on break-up then a Shirley Manson solo contribution and more whispers of new material as far back as 2007.

Butch Vig and Scottish frontwoman Shirley Manson, who took a break to pursue acting (she played a bot on Sarah Connor Chronicles) plus bassist Duke Erikson and guitarist Steve Marker are bringing us their fifth album, which Rolling Stone just revealed is due in March or April of 2012. (We may see a single in December or January)

Continue reading “A New Garbage Album Is Expected In March, 2012!”

Emily Haines Reveals New Metric Album Details

Emily Haines of the massive indie/rock band Metric revealed to Spin Magazine’s Peter Gaston that they already have 13 songs ready to mix for their upcoming fifth CD, a follow-up to their massive 2009 hit Fantasies, which had them playing arena shows and rolling in the success of songs like “Help I’m Alive” and “Gold Guns Girls.”

The enormity of their fifth effort earned them an offer to pen a track for the Twilight: Eclipse soundtrack with Howard Shore – a very brave and questionable career move. The type that might cause skeptical fans to throw “sell out” digs their way…

Continue reading “Emily Haines Reveals New Metric Album Details”

B.o.B’s ‘Strange Clouds’ Passed Adele And Maroon 5 On iTunes

B.o.B’s new song “Strange Clouds” featuring Lil’ Wayne surpassed Maroon 5’s “Moves Like Jagger,” which spent weeks at the top spot, and Adele’s “Someone Like You” whose video was just released, on the iTunes top songs chart yesterday.

B.o.B aka Bobby Ray Simmons, 22, is of course famous for his songs “Nothin’ On You” featuring Bruno Mars and “Airplanes” featuring Haley Williams, two of the absolute biggest hits of 2010.

His sophomore album will also be titled “Strange Clouds” and the rapper promises to release another new song after he reaches 400,000 followers on Twitter. (He’s currently shy of 300,000, at 279,589)…

Continue reading “B.o.B’s ‘Strange Clouds’ Passed Adele And Maroon 5 On iTunes”