Holly Madison Is A Ballerina Now, Will Appear In ‘The Nutcracker’

Holly Madison, the least nut-crackery of Hef’s girlfriends and current star of “Peepshow” at Planet Hollywood is set to make a cameo in the Nevada Ballet Theater’s annual Nutcracker production.

I’d just like to say that implants are not allowed in the ballet, and I am very upset. Every year I drive 1017.45 miles just to see The Nutcracker in Vegas, and this year it’s been tainted by deceit, harlotry and silicon.

The ballet is the one place that had not been affected by the blasphemous sin of Vegas, therefore it was slightly magical, but forget about it. This year I’m staying in Oregon. Fuck you Holly.

This abomination runs from Dec. 17-24 at the Paris Theater, in case YOU wanted to go.

Lady Gaga Brings The Booty Ballet To Ellen

One of the things I love about Lady Gaga is her loyalty. Loyalty to certain talk shows, and New York, as in, god I hope she never moves to Los Angeles and loses her nightclubby stage art, pizza grease soul. Gaga also seems to have sworn allegiance to Ellen DeGeneres, which means she brought her already tired single, “Marry The Night,” to the show.

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