Trademarking Your Deformities

I’ve heard of insuring your body parts, J-lo’s big ass and Tommy lee’s penis but this story is absolutely atrocious.

According to Dlisted.com, The world’s ugliest basketball player, Anthony Davis, is reportedly trademarking his puke-inducing eyebrow/unibrow. I literally feel like crying when I see his ugly face, but that’s the power of a unibrow.

And he says, “I don’t want anyone to try to grow a unibrow because of me and then try to make money off of it. Me and my family decided to trademark it because it’s very unique.”  Continue reading “Trademarking Your Deformities”

Cher’s Hair Is Taller Than Chaz Bono

Cher shocked attendees at the GLAAD’s 23rd Annual Media Awards on Saturday when she stood next to her 5’5″ son, Chaz Bono rocking a gigantic Tamara Dobson-worthy afro. (Google her)

Maybe for Cher height hair equals the amount of support and pride she’s feeling inside?

#CherFro equals happiness.

Ms. Sarkisian (original last name) surprised the crowd when she put her chap-knitting hobby aside for one night to present Chaz with the Stephen F. Kolzak Award.

This award is handed out annually to an openly LBGT celeb for helping to eliminate homophobia in some way. The book Transition: The Story Of How I Became A Man and an appearance on the highly successful show Dancing With The Stars certainly qualifies.

Continue reading “Cher’s Hair Is Taller Than Chaz Bono”

National Enquirer Says Chaz Bono Has 4 Years Left To Live

I don’t usually get offended by crazy made-up stories from gossip-hungry tabloids (probably because that’s sort of what The Twist is) BUT this is ridiculous.

The National Enquirer printed a story claiming that Chaz Bono would only live until 2015 because of his weight and gender reassignment surgery. (I wonder how long they give Kevin Federline, or Gabourey Sidibe?)

Apparently the reasoning is that “obesity, testosterone supplements, past depression and high suicide rates among transgendered people” increase his chances of a very early demise.

Continue reading “National Enquirer Says Chaz Bono Has 4 Years Left To Live”

Why Doesn’t Carson Kressley Dance With A Man On DWTS?

A recent controversy sparked by Chaz Bono had me wondering something…

If Carson Kressley from Queer Eye is gay and on Dancing With The Stars, why doesn’t he get to dance with a man?

Chaz Bono is dancing with a woman, I understand that he is transgendered but if DWTS is so open-minded then why is that not happening?

They still don’t have a professional dancer who is comfortable dancing with another man?

They kind of all look like they would be to me so maybe that is up to the producers? I saw Lacey Schwimmer’s (Chaz’s partner) on TV the other day, she didn’t look so comfortable herself.

Continue reading “Why Doesn’t Carson Kressley Dance With A Man On DWTS?”

Dancing With The “Stars” 2011 Cast

Today the supposed cast of ABC’s Dancing With The Stars was leaked to the public. I don’t watch the show, because the dancing isn’t quite bad enough (or good enough) to hold my attention.

I’d rather just see a bunch of youths doing backflips on America’s Best Dance Crew, because if I watch Dancing With The Stars I will be reminded of age, and nationwide embarrassment.

Light drumroll… the season 13 cast consists of:

Nancy Grace (Ohh I forgot to put HER on my witches slideshow!)
Ricki Lake (Y
ou was hot when? Ricki Lake. ((Nicki Minaj lyrics)
Ron Artest
(Nickname “Metta World Peace”)
Chaz Bono
(Cher’s son, neck-beard included)
David Arquette
(Screaming like Rocky, “Courtneyyy!!” Instead of “Adriann!”)
Kristin Cavalleri
(Her handbag is HUGE)
Rob Kardashian
(Wishes he wasn’t a Kardashian so he could fuck his sisters)
Continue reading “Dancing With The “Stars” 2011 Cast”