Chris Hemsworth’s Fake Dong In ‘Vacation’ Is Terrifying

  

Chris Hemsworth has giant arms, giant calves, giant pectoral muscles, a giant mane of flowing blond hair and is part of a giant blockbuster franchise.

In short, there’s nothing short about him. (NSFW gif ahead.)  Continue reading “Chris Hemsworth’s Fake Dong In ‘Vacation’ Is Terrifying”

Trailer: Thor: The Dark World

The new trailer for the wonderfully over-the-top Thor sequel is here! Watch Chris Hemsworth screech as his lady love (Natalie Portman, in her first role since 2011’s Thor, after a pregnancy hiatus) is captured.

In Thor: The Dark World, in theaters November 8, the red-caped, hammer-wielding hunk of smoldering blond charm must team up with his evil adopted brother Loki to defeat the Dark Elves of Svartalfheim.

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Trailer: Red Dawn

Here’s a really really simple description of the Red Dawn remake starring Chris Hemsworth, Josh Peck, Adrianne Palicki, and Josh Hutcherson from IMDb:

“A group of teenagers look to save their town from an invasion of North Korean soldiers.”

Now you tell me what’s wrong with that? Maybe it’s that none of the people in this movie are teenagers, which of course isn’t an uncommon occurrence in Hollywood (see Pretty Little Liars, Glee, The O.C., and Beverly Hills 90210).  Continue reading “Trailer: Red Dawn”

‘Snow White And The Huntsman’ Trailer And Posters!

I know there’s been a lot of hype about the new Snow White movie, and let’s face it, the Kristen Stewart/Charlize Theron/Chris Hemsworth one is the real deal. Not this Julia Roberts Mirror, Mirror” contender that didn’t even have a name until a few weeks ago.

Until now I’d been half-heartedly promoting Snow White And The Hunstman with all the clearly high-budget stills of K-Stew looking like a character in Skyrim but now I see what the fuss is about! This trailer isn’t messing around, Charlize Theron looks like class act up there.

The queen always was the classically insecure woman. The girl with all the faux confidence, addicted to shiny surfaces. These days it’s the girl on the bus gazing into her iPhone – you know, the one with the black screen.

If only we could all just poison people who visually threaten us, tempt them with cyanide-flavored Pinkberry. That’d be good population control too, because half the world would suddenly evaporate. You know you’re that shallow.

Continue reading “‘Snow White And The Huntsman’ Trailer And Posters!”