Coldplay Taking Three Years Off From Touring/Recording

Chris Martin told fans at a show at Suncorp Stadium in Brisbane, Australia that Coldplay will not be performing at large venues for several years.

“This is the last big show for three years or so,” he said. “I don’t want to stop.”

Oh but I do want you to stop, just like I want Green Day and The Killers to. Unlike those two bands, I NEVER liked Coldplay and am thrilled to hear that they may be taking a three-year break.

You have to assume that no more “big shows” means no more CDs period, because they wouldn’t make an album and not tour for it. Right? Continue reading “Coldplay Taking Three Years Off From Touring/Recording”

Video: Coldplay – “Princess Of China” Feat. Rihanna

Here is the Adria Petty (Tom’s daughter) directed POC video. “POC” of course, stands for “piece of crap” and I say that only because it combines two things that don’t belong together…

This isn’t “cool” like when Run-DMC joined Aerosmith for “Walk This Way” or when Anthrax hopped onto Public Enemy’s “Bring The Noise.” No, this is like Phil Collins in that Bone Thugs video.

Continue reading “Video: Coldplay – “Princess Of China” Feat. Rihanna”

Coldplay’s Chris Martin Admits His Lyrics Are ‘Shit’

The Coldplay frontman told NME“I know our lyrics are a bit shit, but those ones [for ‘Charlie Brown’] I like them a lot.” “Charlie Brown” is song number four on their latest watered-down U2 ripoff party called Mylo Xyloto.

And to prove his idiocy (though finally he’s being honest about how half-assed his band really is) he said, on his potential hit duet with Rihanna, called “Princess Of China:”

Continue reading “Coldplay’s Chris Martin Admits His Lyrics Are ‘Shit’”

Every Teardrop Is A Moment Listening To Coldplay

So I’m sitting on my couch writing on my laptop at 2:15 a.m. and watching Fuse’s All Nighter show, which is distant compared to the clicking of keys but still prevalent, and all of a sudden guess what I hear? The devil’s voice! Seeping out of my TV like cheap toothpaste. And he’s not what you’d think, his voice is high-pitched, and by no means as commanding as you’d expect the devil’s voice to be.

Then I tune my ears in to his voice, and I feel him hypnotizing me with some horrendous new form of torture. And what is that new form of torture? The one where blood comes pouring from my ear canal, and there can never be enough tissues or towels or doctors to stop the painful endless surge of tissue that is escaping my hemorrhaging brain…

Continue reading “Every Teardrop Is A Moment Listening To Coldplay”