Yeezus Honeymoon Period Ends as Critics Suddenly Remember Kanye West is a Terrible Person

Yeezus original coverIt’s been an exciting week for America’s favorite douchebag Kanye West, with the release of not only his Kardashian lovechild North, but also his much anticipated new album Yeezus, which “leaked” last week to overwhelmingly positive reviews.

I mean shit, even the snobby assholes over at Pitchfork gave the album a 9.5 and slapped it with a “Best New Music” award. And these are the people who once gave a 2.0 rating to a Nine Inch Nails album.  You know what?  Fuck Pitchfork.

When the weekend rolled around, however, critics began digging deeper into the album. Dorian Lynskey wrote up a solid review questioning some of Kanye’s lyrics and messaging.  Among Lynskey’s least favorite lyrics are “Put my fist in her like a civil rights sign” (nice!) and “I call that apartheid,”  referring to his wife and mistress being forced to sit on opposite sides of the basketball court at an NBA game (Courtside Apartheid?  Also, what wife and mistress?  Kim Kardashian doesn’t count).  Continue reading “Yeezus Honeymoon Period Ends as Critics Suddenly Remember Kanye West is a Terrible Person”

‘Man of Steel’ Kills At Box Office, Doesn’t Wow Critics

Henry Cavill superman costume
Man of Steel’s scored a massive $113 million at the box office over the weekend but failed to impress the majority of critics and nerds, who complained about it not being as humorous as Thor, Amy Adams’ non-brown hair and Henry Cavill smoldering too much for their fragile eyes.

The biggest flaw cited was the apparent lack of fun. Richard Roeper wrote“There’s very little humor or joy in this Superman story, and not enough character development for us really to care.”

I beg to differ. The scene where tiny Clark Kent locks himself in a closet at school because he’s overwhelmed by the sight of his classmate’s nasal cavities made me care about him and his earth mama Martha (Diane Lane), who consoles him through the door as he tells her that the world is just too big.
kevin costner man of steel
The opening scene on Krypton made me care about his birthparents Lara (Ayelet Zurer) and Jor-El (Russell Crowe), and every scene with Kevin Costner (especially the one with the tornado) made my eyes water because it was Father’s Day and mine’s dead. (Just kidding, I’m mostly fine.)  Continue reading “‘Man of Steel’ Kills At Box Office, Doesn’t Wow Critics”

Can ‘The Dark Knight Rises’ Win Best Picture?

Christopher Nolan’s highly anticipated conclusion to Batman Begins and The Dark Knight was screened for critics on July 6. Not only did it received a standing ovation, one reviewer Tweeted words he’d heard after that have already substantially added to the hype.

A prediction that The Dark Knight Rises would not only be nominated for an Academy Award, but that it should win, “If this does not break the mold and win Best Picture, no comic book movie ever will #TDKR.”

Tom McAuliffe wrote that it was a “9 out of 10” for him and elaborated his praise, saying it was better than The Dark Knight, which received four stars from Roger Ebert (he famous for giving everything three) and won Heath Ledger a posthumous best actor Oscar.  Continue reading “Can ‘The Dark Knight Rises’ Win Best Picture?”

Whitney Cummings Gets Candid About The Criticism Towards Her Show

Whitney Cummings became a friend of the Howard Stern Show back in late 2008 after she gained notoriety for her Comedy Central roast jokes.

Since then she’s become the writer and producer of two shows, 2 Broke Girls and Whitney, one acclaimed, one heavily criticized.

Cummings appeared on Stern last week (I get a lot of story ideas from there because I’m a non-famous member of the wack packin a state of disarray (about the backlash towards Whitney) and honesty about her sister’s drug and alcohol addiction. When Howard expressed concern about her emotional state, the insult comic known for her tough-exterior nearly broke down in tears.  Continue reading “Whitney Cummings Gets Candid About The Criticism Towards Her Show”

Adam Sandler’s ‘Jack And Jill’ Reviews Are A Drag

On Friday, Adam Sandler’s latest comedy Jack And Jill wasn’t an easy over-the-top pill to swallow. In fact, the previews for the film featuring Sandler as himself and as his own sister, were more Scary Movie or SNL skit/spoof than reality.

Rotten Tomatoes had Jack And Jill receiving a 0% rating the day it came out, and later a 3% with critics saying things like “More than 24 hours has passed since I watched the new Adam Sandler movie Jack and Jill and I am still dead inside.” (And that’s from Time Magazine)

Brian Orndorf said, “I’m not even sure this qualifies as a real movie,” with Rene Rodriguez of the Miami Herald interjecting, “Left to his own devices, Sandler reverts to his worst, laziest habits.” Key words from ALL reviewers = BAD, SWILL, UNFUNNY and SAD.

Continue reading “Adam Sandler’s ‘Jack And Jill’ Reviews Are A Drag”