Snooki and Elizabeth Berkeley Are Taking ‘Dancing With The Stars’ By Storm

Snooki showgirls Elzabeth BerkeleyThe cast of season 17 of Dancing With The Stars was announced today, and while it included semi-knowns like Billy Nye, Leah Remini, Jack Osbourne and Amber Riley, I only care about two names…

Snooki and freaking Elizabeth Berkeley! Yes. This means that my dream of the Notorious Tan Midget hanging out with a real giant (sorry JWoww) is about to come true.

At 5’10”, Elizabeth Berkeley (of Saved by the Bell fame), stands a foot and two inches above Snooki, who is 4’8″.

They will become lifelong friends, starting with getting drunk on the Jersey pier and yelling lines from the Showgirls script at each other. I never watch this shitty show and I don’t plan on it now, but I will keep my eyes on Ms. Polizzi’s Twitter and Instagram for photos of them tearing it up.

Nancy Grace Points Fart Cloud Finger At Dance Partner

After she (most likely) passed extreme gas on Monday’s Dancing With The Stars episode last week, Nancy Grace has denied the windy allegations, blaming her Irish partner, Tristan MacManus.

She joked on Thursday to reporters by saying, “If you listen really closely to that clip, it has an Irish accent.” Oh yes, that old trick. Blame it on someone else, someone less famous and less annoying.

We all know it was you Nancy. We know you eat nothing but hamburger meat and chicken cutlets sauteed in garlic and that it makes you toot like Thomas The Train.

You’re just a jolly lady who gets off on farting and exposing your breasts to strangers for the hell of it…

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Nancy Grace’s Peepshow

Now I know the abbreviation “DWTS” sounds like porno terminology (an extension of DP?) but I don’t think that’s what they intended when they made the show.

Somehow on Monday’s Dancing With The Stars the least sexy person on the show (besides Chaz Bono) managed to have a mild wardrobe malfunction.

Part of Nancy Grace’s bajingo fell out. Partial areola-disclosure and an abundance of breast lard, was definitely exposed.

(Click HERE for the uncensored pic)…

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Why Doesn’t Carson Kressley Dance With A Man On DWTS?

A recent controversy sparked by Chaz Bono had me wondering something…

If Carson Kressley from Queer Eye is gay and on Dancing With The Stars, why doesn’t he get to dance with a man?

Chaz Bono is dancing with a woman, I understand that he is transgendered but if DWTS is so open-minded then why is that not happening?

They still don’t have a professional dancer who is comfortable dancing with another man?

They kind of all look like they would be to me so maybe that is up to the producers? I saw Lacey Schwimmer’s (Chaz’s partner) on TV the other day, she didn’t look so comfortable herself.

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Dancing With The “Stars” 2011 Cast

Today the supposed cast of ABC’s Dancing With The Stars was leaked to the public. I don’t watch the show, because the dancing isn’t quite bad enough (or good enough) to hold my attention.

I’d rather just see a bunch of youths doing backflips on America’s Best Dance Crew, because if I watch Dancing With The Stars I will be reminded of age, and nationwide embarrassment.

Light drumroll… the season 13 cast consists of:

Nancy Grace (Ohh I forgot to put HER on my witches slideshow!)
Ricki Lake (Y
ou was hot when? Ricki Lake. ((Nicki Minaj lyrics)
Ron Artest
(Nickname “Metta World Peace”)
Chaz Bono
(Cher’s son, neck-beard included)
David Arquette
(Screaming like Rocky, “Courtneyyy!!” Instead of “Adriann!”)
Kristin Cavalleri
(Her handbag is HUGE)
Rob Kardashian
(Wishes he wasn’t a Kardashian so he could fuck his sisters)
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