Video: Teenage Emma Stone Sings “Bitch”

Before her film debut in Superbad and after bumping stomachs with Tweedledee at a children’s theater in Arizona, circa 2004 Emma Stone was singing the wildly inappropriate “Bitch” by Meredith Brooks on national television.  Continue reading “Video: Teenage Emma Stone Sings “Bitch””

Sofia Vergara, Emma Stone, Jeremy Piven Read Mean Tweets

Julia Roberts mean tweetIn Jimmy Kimmal’s latest edition of celebs reading outrageous tweets about themsevles, Courtney Cox gets called a “p*ssy hoe” while Kit Harrington is a “big bitch” and Julia Roberts simply has gaping lips that swallow 10,000-pound African land mammals whole.

Users also wonder why Sofia Vergara talks “like she has a d*ck in her mouth” and say they hope Jeremy Piven’s falls off in public, so I was thinking to save time his d*ck could fall off and land in Sofia Vergara’s mouth during the day on the Hollywood Walk of Fame while Emma Stone, who reeks of cat piss, videotapes it and Gary Oldman narrates.  Continue reading “Sofia Vergara, Emma Stone, Jeremy Piven Read Mean Tweets”

Emma Stone is the Nicki Minaj of Lip Syncing

Crazy adorable ginger (and only reason to ever step foot in a theater showing Amazing Spider-Man 2) Emma Stone decimated the competition over at The Tonight Show with her mouthed renditions of the equally challenging “Hook” by Blues Traveler and DJ Khaled’s “All I Do Is Win.”

Fallon’s dance moves didn’t stand a chance against Emma, whose lips and arms were moving so fast that audience members in the front row witnessed some of her freckles bouncing off her skin and into their laps.

I never thought I’d see John Popper and Ludacris proud on the same day…

Emma Stone to Rock a Bowler Hat in ‘Cabaret’?

Emma Stone Vogue 2012 hatEntertainment Wise is reporting that Emma Stone might make her Broadway debut as Sally Bowles in the next production of Cabaret alongside veteran Alan Cumming, a role previously thought to have been offered to Anne Hathaway.

Stone does have a little musical theatre background and has been known to bust a move (mostly in a comedic context), but I have no idea if she’ll make a good Sally Bowles or not.

It’s very hard to imagine her doing a bad job at anything. At the very least, her performance would be charming.

I’ve always been a bitterbush about not being able to go to Broadway plays, but I’d rather live in Susan Boyle’s armpit than a city as big as New York. So, there’s that.

Continue reading “Emma Stone to Rock a Bowler Hat in ‘Cabaret’?”

Emma Stone’s Ex Waiting for Right Moment to Release Sex Tape

Radar Online is reporting that an old flame of Emma Stone‘s has a sex tape but isn’t shopping it around yet because she isn’t quite famous enough.

A source says, “The tape remains in the hands of the person she made it with. But that doesn’t mean there’s any guarantee that it won’t eventually hit the market. The higher Emma’s star rises, the more valuable that tape becomes.”

Nobody has actually seen this mysterious footage and Radar’s source saying “Emma Stone has a sex tape and that’s a fact” hardly makes it true. Regardless, Stone’s comparisons to Lucille Ball can be applied here.  Continue reading “Emma Stone’s Ex Waiting for Right Moment to Release Sex Tape”

Children’s Theater Photos Of Emma Stone

While making the rounds for Spider-Man promotion, Emma Stone dropped by Letterman on Monday.

He showed some pictures that I’d never seen from her days at the Valley Youth Theatre.

At grade school age Emma was in no less than 16 productions at the theatre, located in Phoenix, Arizona. She told the Late Show host:

“You’ll notice that in most of the photos, it just consists of me going [makes surprised face].”

And those surprised faces are melting the frosty fossilized onyx that resides in my chest.

There are more images floating around the net, her as Eeyore, and old lady, and others that are sure to make you find Ms. Garfield even more adorable than you already did.  Continue reading “Children’s Theater Photos Of Emma Stone”

Emma Stone For Vogue, July 2012

Vogue is as in love with Emma Stone as the rest of the country. She’s covering both U.S. Vogue for the first time and Teen Vogue (August) with sticky-fingered spandex-wearing Andrew Garfield.

To Vogue, singular, she talked about panic attacks, the importance of being an actress, and fashion.

Garfield, Spider-Man’s producer Matt Tolmach, and director Marc Webb also praised her repeatedly, using words like “thrilling,” “stunning,” spontaneous,” and “disarming.”

On acting:
“I’m not saving lives. But I get to tell stories, and that’s a pretty important task.”

Fashion’s effect on people:
“It makes them feel like it’s an extension of themselves.”

Continue reading “Emma Stone For Vogue, July 2012”

People’s Choice Fashions, You Be The Judge

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Many stars of music, television and movies showed up for the 2012 People’s Choice Awards, hosted by The Big Bang Theory’s Kaley Cuoco. From Robert Pattinson’s shaved head to Emma Stone’s Emerald City Gucci suit.

Continue reading “People’s Choice Fashions, You Be The Judge”

Emma Stone As A Frenchy And A Pervy Old Broad, On ‘SNL’

I’d put her female comedic timing right up there next to the Anna Faris and Jennifer Anistons of this generation. Her dialogue-less physical humor in “Les Jeunes de Paris” and as Kristen Wiig’s inappropriate co-worker in the bridal shower skit were astounding.

I too wish I could give my recently married friends the gift of anal lubricant (“unscented petroleum gel, to ease anal penetration”) and/or human toilets, but alas they have banned me from all events of that type and have restraining orders against me. It’s probably because my laugh isn’t as funny as Emma Stone’s.

Continue reading “Emma Stone As A Frenchy And A Pervy Old Broad, On ‘SNL’”