Lady Gaga Ascending to Outer Space in 2015

Lady Gaga grammy space outfitSince her first CD and break into the industry, Lady Gaga has seemed too big for this world. From her outfits and attitude to her day-long birth from an egg, the ultimate metaphor for ego will finally come to fruition in 2015, when she ventures into space on a Virgin Galactic ship, courtesy of Richard Branson.

Gaga is reportedly scheduled to perform above New Mexico for the mysterious Zero G Colony festival, which is described as “a music experience that is truly out of this world” on the official website.

A source says she will have to prepare with extra lung-strengthening vocal training the month before, to prepare for the pressure change. ANDDD maybe she’ll stay in space until she comes up with new material and stops releasing b-sides from The Fame falsely packaged as new material. (At least that would explain the R. Kelly duet.)

EDC Expecting Fucking Ridiculous 345,000 Attendees This Year

electric daisy carnival crowd
It’s that time of year again–break out your glow sticks and gear up for this year’s annual Tutu Convention Electric Daisy Carnival, which will be held for the third year in a row at the Las Vegas Motor Speedway this coming weekend, June 21-23.

The festival has grown immensely since moving from Los Angeles to Vegas in 2011, after the disastrous 2010 Los Angeles event which involved the death of a 15-year-old girl as well as general, widespread, drug-induced chaos around the Los Angeles area (a.k.a. 114 arrests).

It’s clearly a fucking awesome time, but anyone attending this year should be prepared for disgusting, sweaty, uncomfortably squishy crowds, as the festival sold out all 345,000 of its tickets for the weekend, putting the final count at 115,000 attendees per night.  Continue reading “EDC Expecting Fucking Ridiculous 345,000 Attendees This Year”

What Is Wrong With Cops These Days?

During the West Indian-American Carnival and Parade several members of the NYPD were filmed dry-hump dancing with some of the barely-dressed festival participant women.

However Commissioner Ray Kelly would rather not ‘make too much of it.’

He told reporters at a press conference after the incident occurred over Labor Day Weekend,

“I don’t want to make too much of it. You know, these young women approached the officers. They didn’t go out of their way to be approached like this.” 

Continue reading “What Is Wrong With Cops These Days?”

I Know You’re Already Aware, But Juggalos Are SCARY

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Check out the scary scary slideshow (above) of random juggalos and juggalettes, and some of the performers at the event….

The annual Gathering of The Juggalos took place on August 11, 2011 in Illinois, and I cannot emphasis enough how terrified I am of these people.

It’s not like I sit in my house shivering, waiting for a bunch of painted-clown face wiggers to bust into my house and kill me. They’re just so weird, and beyond my sense of reality. I could say I don’t know what goes through their fumigated heads, but it’s simple. Beer. Clowns. Music. Beer. Tits. ICP.

This year a wonderfully varied group of characters performed at the festival, such as Lil’ Jon, Ice Cube, the other ice: Vanilla, MC Hammer, Dustin Diamond, Ron Jeremy, Xzibit, Tech N9ne, Flavor Flav, Juvenile, George Clinton and of course the founders of the festival, Insane Clown Posse.

Continue reading “I Know You’re Already Aware, But Juggalos Are SCARY”

Rihanna Gets BarbadoClownTastic For Kadooment Day

 Monday was a fun day for my favorite black Wendy’s mascot Rihanna. The pop singer took a day off from her Loud tour to relax in her native Barbados for Kadooment Day for their annual “Crop Over” festival, which is pretty self-explanatory and amazing in itself.

Crop Over. MAN DOWN. Rum pum pum pum MAN DOWN, CROP OVER. Eh eh eh (It’s that simple)

And also…

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