Jennifer Lawrence in Hawaii to Film ‘Catching Fire,’ Takes Bikini Break

The 22-year-old actress who has ridiculously been called overweight, plus size and fat, went on a work-related trip to Hawaii for the highly anticipated Hunger Games sequel.

Jennifer Lawrence took her not-huge-at-all behind to a Maui beach for a surfing lesson with her older brother.

In just a week, Lawrence will travel to nearby Oahu for some of Katniss Everdeen’s famous Catching Fire island scenes with Peeta (Josh Hutcherson), Finnick (Sam Claflin), Johanna (Jena Malone), Beetee, Mags and Wiress.

I won’t give too much away, but the second movie has the potential to be even better than the first. The third, I’m not so sure how they’ll film, but that’s not happening until 2014 (and 15).

Continue reading “Jennifer Lawrence in Hawaii to Film ‘Catching Fire,’ Takes Bikini Break”

Oprah To Peddle Organic Veggies and Beauty Products

Oprah Winfrey has tackled television, movies and magazines and is now planting her pitchfork firmly in the organic food industry.

Documents dug up by the New York Post show that she is deciding on the names “Oprah’s Organics,” “Oprah’s Harvest” and “Oprah’s Farm” for her new business

Edibles will be grown in Hawaii and will spawn beverages, salad dressing, frozen vegetables, soup, and snack dips.

And, she’s not only going to be stepping on Paul Newman’s toes, but Burt’s Bees as well.

Beauty products like soaps, shower gels, lotion, shampoo, oils and skin care cream are also on the menu and I’d be very surprised if Oprah’s beaming face wasn’t on every bottle.

Surprisingly, she’s not even listed as one of the top 20 richest women in America.  Continue reading “Oprah To Peddle Organic Veggies and Beauty Products”

Jenny McCarthy Had Sex With A Tree, Blames Ecstasy

Thank you, Huffington Post and everyone else. “Actress Tried To Have Sex With A Tree” is officially the best headline of 2012 because it makes you want to read on AND it’s laugh-out-loud funny.

In her new book, Bad Habits: Confessions of a Recovering CatholicPlayboy favorite Jenny McCarthy writes about a time she took too much X in Hawaii and became turned on by everything, including the tree she used to hold herself up.

“The texture felt so good that I decided to rub my head and boobs all over it. It was a tree I was humping.” In another explanation of the affair, she tells Chelsea Handler:

“I took five at once, and I was rolling muh balls off.” Continue reading “Jenny McCarthy Had Sex With A Tree, Blames Ecstasy”

Kelly Osbourne Is Dating Alison Mosshart

Reformed “bad girl” Kelly Osbourne traded in her last boyfriend (who cheated on her with a pre-op transgender named Elle) for Matthew Mosshart.

If you’re at all familiar with the band The Kills, know that Matthew is lead singer Alison Mosshart’s brother and there is a strong resemblance.

In case the shorts and flowery kimono thing weren’t a big enough clue, they’re in Hawaii, for Jack Osbourne’s wedding.

Kelly also flaunted her bikini body, which is 50 pounds lighter because she eats cucumbers for breakfast.

In 2010 she told Shape that she’d “never worn a bikini” in her whole life.

Things change, but the Mossharts will always have long greasy hair.  Continue reading “Kelly Osbourne Is Dating Alison Mosshart”

Romney Campaign Calls Obama A Hawaiian Stoner, Makes Him Sound Cool As F**k

Mitt Romney stand-in John Sununu insulted Obama’s senatorial state of Illinois and called him an Un-American “scoundrel” on Fox News. The fun doesn’t stop there. Sununu also said that “He has no idea how the American system functions. And we shouldn’t be surprised about that because he spent his early years in Hawaii smoking something…and another set of years in Indonesia.”

The thing is, he just made Barack sound cooler to the naive Democratic 15 to 40-something demographic. While Sununu surely made a few Romney supporters nod their heads in approval, the effect this has on liberals outweighs that.

Continue reading “Romney Campaign Calls Obama A Hawaiian Stoner, Makes Him Sound Cool As F**k”

Just In Case You Weren’t 100% Sure That Megan Fox Was Carrying David Silver’s Baby…

Several months ago, Brian Austin Green tossed a fastball covered in tadpoles into Jennifer’s Body. After not answering yes or no to curious reporters, Megan Fox‘s status a pregnant woman has been confirmed by visual proof.

She and Green visited Kona, Hawaii for their wedding anniversary and Fox was photographed in a bikini with little David Silver kissing her belly like it held the Khaleesi’s second son.

Speaking of second children, this is the Beverly Hills 90210 star’s second child. His first, 10-year-old Kassius, was conceived with ex-wife Vanessa Marcil.  Continue reading “Just In Case You Weren’t 100% Sure That Megan Fox Was Carrying David Silver’s Baby…”

Nicki Minaj Debuts Hawaiian Beach Romp, “Starships”

Remember the time Nicki Minaj was beamed out of a spaceship on a tropical island? If you haven’t seen this video then you don’t remember, because it JUST HAPPENED.

Yes, that’s Nicki grinding around Hawaii with green hair and various swimsuits. Mermaids were never easier to catch, but mythical fish or not, I’m starting to realize that I don’t like Nicki Minaj’s persona very much.

Is she starting to fall in line with the Katy Perrys of the world? I listen to some of her songs but I think she’s unusually attention-seeking.

Continue reading “Nicki Minaj Debuts Hawaiian Beach Romp, “Starships””

Rihanna’s Vacation Photos Will Make You Feel Boring

Remember that study about Facebook, that said it makes everything worse for people with low self-esteem (almost everyone) because “Prominent displays of status updates, flattering photos and shots of happy-looking people” make us feel like scheisse?

Rihanna’s latest Facebook photos fall right under that description. Ms. BarbadoClownTastic’s picture section was just updated with no more than 169 visuals from her vacation to Hawaii late last year.

Continue reading “Rihanna’s Vacation Photos Will Make You Feel Boring”

Rihanna Smoking In Hawaii, Plus More Armani Pics

Barbado-not-so-clowntastic-anymore Rihanna was photographed Monday and Tuesday casually puffing on what was almost surely a blunt.

I use “casually” loosely because it actually looks like she fell asleep smoking it though I guess she was just resting her eyes and dreaming of scrawny blonde men with bad tempers.

Continue reading “Rihanna Smoking In Hawaii, Plus More Armani Pics”

Obama’s Football Faceplant In The Sand

Obama took a 10-day holiday break from his presidential duties to play football in Oahu at the Kaneohe Marine Corps Base. His position? Quarterback. Could you imagine him not in a position of power? I think we all can, it’s called the Bush and Clinton years or the imaginary McCain or lady Clinton years.

I’d like to make fun of him in some way (besides that he fell over) but he’s 50 goddamn years old and looks pretty good. Better than he did in those 2008 beach photos, also in his birthplace and favorite vacation spot.

Continue reading “Obama’s Football Faceplant In The Sand”

Nicole Scherzinger Really Likes Banana Tuna Pancakes

You might think that X-Factor judge/singer Nicole Scherzinger eats nothing but blended oats and grass twice daily but in her recent December cover issue interview with Shape magazine, she does reveal a few guilty pleasures.

I was born in Hawaii, so I love dried tuna dipped in soy sauce, kalua pig, banana pancakes with coconut syrup, and chocolate-covered macadamia nuts. My gosh, I could gain 10 pounds just talking about these foods!”

Yeah I lied, she doesn’t put tuna on her pancakes. I just wanted to fabricated a bizarre flaw in a seemingly perfect person. (She does make a wonderful poster girl for these items though)

Continue reading “Nicole Scherzinger Really Likes Banana Tuna Pancakes”

Pregnant Woman Jailed For Accidental Sandwich Thievery

A 28 year-old woman, Nicole Leszczynski and and her husband were arrested on Monday in Honolulu for accidentally walking out of a grocery store without paying for two sandwiches that were worth a total of five dollars.

The ridiculousness doesn’t stop there, not only were Nicole Leszczynski and her husband Marcin (a former Air Force sergeant) apprehended after they paid for $50 worth of groceries but their daughter was taken away by Child Welfare Services!

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Video: Friendly Fires – “Hawaiian Air”

And here I present the latest single from Friendly Fires, directed by documentary filmmaker Chris Cottam. “Hawaiian Air,” the sad but sweet, melancholy sound of late summer, or in the case of Hawaii, all-year-round heat accompanied by mass rainstorms.

The song is from their second CD, Pala, released on XL Recordings.

Continue reading “Video: Friendly Fires – “Hawaiian Air””

Keep Your Shirt On, Julia Roberts

Julia Roberts, 43, went for a beachside romp yesterday in Hawaii with Danny Moder (her husband) and their three children. I know she’s only relaxing and taking a day off, not at a photo shoot, but I gotta say, Julia, you look much much better with your shirt on.

Like  as in good! The shirt is good, I’d be like, “Julia Roberts is a cougar,” but then shirt off I’m like “Ohhh nooo, she’s as floppy as Larry Crowne was at the box office.”