Keira Knightley WEDDING DETAILS: Tents, Chanel, And An Old Renault

Keira Knightley wedding dressKeira Knightley got married today to her keyboardist husband James Righton (as in, “Right on James, you married the British version of Natalie Portman”) in the South of France. This is a big deal to me because I have tricked myself into thinking I discovered Keira when she was in Bend It Like Beckham. All I remember saying in 2002 besides “Kill me, I’m still in high school” had to do with that movie.

Blah blah blah soccer movie. David Beckham. India. Girl with short hair. Guru Nanak.

In 2003 I switched to “Did you see that girl from Bend It Like Beckham in Pirates of the Caribbean yet???”

Blah blah blah Johnny Depp. Rum. Elizabeth Swann. CLICK for gifs and stuff about her dress…

In Topless Allure Issue, Keira Knightley Says She Used To Want To Hide Her Body

Keira Knightley addresses rumors that she had an eating disorder in Allure Magazine.

My favorite British person (Bend It Like Beckham is my go-to sick day movie) seems fine now, but says the pressure to not be thin was almost too much for her.

I may relate to this because I was accused of starving myself nearly every day in High School, sometimes while I was eating. Thank god I filled out to the size of a Macy’s Day float at age 17.

“I knew I wasn’t anorexic,” the star of the upcoming Anna Karenina said. “But maybe my body is somehow not right. Or my face is not right. Or the way I speak is not right. When you’re going through a period where you’re really getting a lot of criticism, you go, ‘Maybe all this is right!’ You just kind of want to hide it all.”  Continue reading “In Topless Allure Issue, Keira Knightley Says She Used To Want To Hide Her Body”

Keira Knightley Engaged To Klaxons Keyboardist

Keira Knightley is engaged to the keyboardist and backup vocalist for the band Klaxons, best known indie rock hits like “Golden Skans,” “Gravity’s Rainbow,” and “Atlantis to Interzone.”

They were introduced by Alexa Chung (MTV’s It’s On With Alexa Chung) who once dated another Glastonbury favorite, Alex Turner of Arctic Monkeys.

27 year-old Knightley and 28 year-old James Righton have been together for 15 months and live together in East London. This is the first marriage for both parties.

Right on, James.

Keira Knightley’s Dangerous Skype Method

I haven’t seen the movie A Dangerous Method yet for the same reasons I did not see Shame in theaters and was shushed during Martha Marcy May Marlene.

It’s based on the John Kerr book A Most Dangerous Method and is about the famous psychiatrists Carl Jung, Sigmund Freud, Sabina Spielrein and Otto Gross. Apparently Spielrein (Keira Knightley) is sexually aroused by humiliation because she was beaten by her father. So, of course, Jung (Michael Fassbender of phallic Shame fame) begins spanking her. Continue reading “Keira Knightley’s Dangerous Skype Method”