In All Her Plastic Glory, Elizabeth Taylor Barbie Looks More Like Liz Than Lindsay Ever Will

limited edition Liz Taylor BarbieMattel’s special edition White Diamonds Liz Taylor Barbie‘s arrival is very appropriate considering the iconic actresses’ dedication to AIDS research and awareness dating back to the early 80’s (back when acknowledging that the disease could affect anyone other than disgusting gay man whores was taboo), and that today is World AIDS Day.

Priced at $150 dollars and wearing a white dress very similar to the one from 1958’s Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, the doll comes with gloves, sunglasses, mini perfume bottle and a movie script.

Lindsay Lohan (in all her bloated, lip-injected glory) can’t compare to this plastic masterpiece, which, unlike Liz & Dick, was approved by Taylor. Continue reading “In All Her Plastic Glory, Elizabeth Taylor Barbie Looks More Like Liz Than Lindsay Ever Will”

‘Liz & Dick’ Trailer Finally Shows Lindsay Lohan As Elizabeth Taylor In Motion

The trailer for the latest movie Lindsay Lohan is using as a vehicle to revitalize her career is out. You know, the one that won’t be in theaters, where she plays sad, unglamorous low-budget Lifetime Elizabeth Taylor? Liz & Dick.

My favorite part of this 30-second collage of crazy Lindsay pretending to be crazy someone else is when she’s asked, or rather told, that she just ended her fourth marriage and she (Lohanibeth) snidely responds with a gasp and a “Who’s counting?!”

It’s especially funny because that would probably her actual reply to a person who brought up the number of times she’s been arrested, though maybe she’s actually forgotten (we all have, is it 6 or 16?).

Continue reading “‘Liz & Dick’ Trailer Finally Shows Lindsay Lohan As Elizabeth Taylor In Motion”

Liz Taylor Is Laughing In Her Grave As Lindsay Digs Herself A Shallow One

Do you hear that? Listen closely. It’s the sound of Elizabeth Taylor‘s partially decomposed corpse letting out a deep, booming, well-deserved laugh at Lindsay Lohan‘s expense.

See, Liz played Cleopatra in 1963 and was the original Princess Leia in the gold bikini, the first Farrah Fawcett pin-up. A national sex symbol who preceded everything with the exception of Marilyn Monroe.

Continue reading “Liz Taylor Is Laughing In Her Grave As Lindsay Digs Herself A Shallow One”

Lindsay Lohan Should’ve Played OLD Liz Taylor

The last movie Lindsay Lohan was in was 2010’s Machete. To put it nicely, she is rusty, in more ways than one.

There is now a photo of her in the role of a Lifetime (literally, the channel), as Elizabeth Taylor in Liz & Dick.

To quote Pajiba, “Lindsay Lohan looks just like what you’d expect from an actress playing Liz Taylor in a LIFETIME MOVIE” a “low-rent, store-brand, ribbon-cutting ceremony impersonator that you could rent out for $20 an event.” 70% of nearly 100,000 TMZ readers agreed that the resemblance is “nonexistent.”

Continue reading “Lindsay Lohan Should’ve Played OLD Liz Taylor”