After the Discovery Channel aired a special called “Mermaids: The Body Found” the U.S. government felt obligated to issue an official online statement declaring that Ariel and her trident-wielding people are not real.
This coming shortly after a CDC spokesperson told The Huffington Post that zombies don’t exist either.
“CDC does not know of a virus or condition that would reanimate the dead,” said David Daigle after the bath salt/face-eating incident in Miami.
The National Oceanic And Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) feeling a need to let us know that seductresses of the seas are non-fiction seems even less necessary. Continue reading “The NOAA Wants You To Know That Mermaids Aren’t Real”