Video: Britney Spears – “Perfume”

Britney’s new single almost has better lyrics than “Phonography” from Circus (“I like my bluetooth, buttons comin’ loose”) and “Email My Heart” (self-explanatory) from …Baby One More Time.

In “Perfume” Britney is the other woman, singing “I hope she smells my perfume” and “I want it all over you, I’m gonna mark my territory.” All because of some bitch named Cindy.
Britney Spears Perfume still 1
OF COURSE Britney strips down to sexy granny panties and sprays Fantasy all over her stomach.

Stories I’m Too Lazy To Write About [8-11-12]

Paris Hilton spritzes Snoop Dogg with perfume, gives him a purse. (Idolator)

NBC’s Olympic “Bodies In Motion” video gives new meaning to “bow chicka wow wow.” [Jezebel]

Madonna looks like she’s been taking fashion advice from Taylor Momsen [Entertainment Wise]

Naked Australian surrounded by sharks [Daily Mail]

Mayor of Reykjavík attends gay pride parade as member of Pussy Riot. (Iceland Review)

Guess who looks happy in Marie Claire? Kristen Stewart, of course. [Us Weekly]

Kourtney Kardashian covered her baby with a sheet. [E! Online]

Everybody loves bouncing Dong [Miami Herald]

Jessica Simpson’s dad Joe got a DUI. (Huffington Post)

Marilyn Manson wrote “fuck” on his neck and face. I’m surprised if you are. (Gawker)

Saudi Arabia doesn’t care about female Saudi Arabian athletes. (Yahoo!)

Gaga Becomes Lady Gulliver In New Perfume Ad

Lady Gaga tweeted a link to the above advertisement for her perfume, “Fame,” on her new Social Networking site LittleMonsters.com on Monday.

See how she kills two black ostriches with one stone? Promoting her Bowie-esque perfume AND her website at the same time? Smart woman.  Continue reading “Gaga Becomes Lady Gulliver In New Perfume Ad”

First Look At Lady Gaga’s Perfume

Lady Gaga was forced to release images of her perfume due to Flare editor Lisa Tant leaking information and a photo of it.

Gaga Tweeted “Looks like photos of my perfume are being leaked. Oh you fashion editors I could just crinkle my hands at you!”

It is the first black perfume ever (there have been others in cologne and toilette forms) and smells like “tears of belladonna, crushed heart of tiger orchidea with a black veil of incense, pulverized apricot and the combinative essences of saffron and honey drops.”

Continue reading “First Look At Lady Gaga’s Perfume”

Rihanna Is Naked For The 1000th Time

It’s good that Rihanna‘s becoming a movie star, because soon she can transition into dramatic roles, which will require her to be naked constantly (like Charlize Theron, Kate Winslet, and Angelina Jolie) and that will be no problem.

Yes, Ri “boom mahalo motherfucker” Hanna  is not a modest woman. The proof is in the behind-the-scenes Nude perfume shoot pictures on Instagram. 

Posted by BarbadoBlondeTastic’s close friend Melissa Forde, these four sex faces fit perfectly in your pg-13 pop star trading card binder – in between the Armani photos and leaked 2009 phone shots.

Continue reading “Rihanna Is Naked For The 1000th Time”

Milla Jovovich’s Windy Bum-Flash Moment

Milla Jovovich, famous for nude scenes in movies, can add [almost] public nakedness to her resume.

The actress/model/singer/zombie-murderess was in New York filming an Avon perfume commercial when she suffered a momentary Marilyn Monroe moment circa The Seven Year Itch .

This is more modern, a little more exposure and some kind of string underwear that is barely visible instead of Marilyn’s high-waisted garment that Katy Perry would call “a long pair of shorts.”

Milla’s also got a new album coming out (she released her first, The Divine Comedy in 1994) and we can expect it in early fall plus a video in July for the single “Electric Sky” which will be available on iTunes May 19.  Continue reading “Milla Jovovich’s Windy Bum-Flash Moment”

Adam Levine’s New Cologne + Christina’s Booming Laughter

These days, it’s bizarre when a celebrity DOESN’T have a scent. Now Adam Levine of The Voice/Maroon 5 is launching a fragrance called “222,” which is already the name of his clothing/instrument/whatever line.

I always wonder what these things are going to smell like, but then I remember that they all smell the same. I mean, Britney Spears’ Fantasy was pure sugar/cotton candy and Paris Hilton’s are unsurprisingly fruity and surprisingly not gross. I’ve smelled Usher’s junk (not that junk) and I can’t tell the difference between that and a knockoff from Payless.  Continue reading “Adam Levine’s New Cologne + Christina’s Booming Laughter”

Paris Hilton Made Over A Billion Dollars On Perfume Alone

“Jealousy” is not just a song by Paris Hilton, it’s an emotion that comes up when you hear how much money she makes. Besides being a billionaire heiress with just her family’s hotel money, Paris told FHM UK that her fragrances alone have produced more than $1.3 billion since 2005.

What else is new with Paris? She has brown hair. Way more shocking than the wages she garnished from scentless slaves in China. She also revealed to FHM UK that “British guys are really different to the guys in America.” She must have noticed their accents and lack of circumcisions and a non-compact fluorescent bulb went off.

Continue reading “Paris Hilton Made Over A Billion Dollars On Perfume Alone”

Dakota Fanning’s Banned Perfume Ad

When describing this situation TooFab.com said that “Dakota Fanning has managed to keep away from controversy, until now.” Which isn’t exactly true, if anyone saw The Runaways or Hounddog, which contained a rape scene.

The latest controversy surrounding a still teenage Dakota Fanning, child star and current Twilight actress, involves a perfume ad distributed by Coty UK, which was recently banned in England.

The objection comes from several readers, who saw the Marc Jacobs “Oh, Lola!” perfume promo in a magazine and complained that it was “offensive and irresponsible.” The ASA then (Advertising Standard Authority) intervened saying,

“We understood the model was 17 years old but we considered she looked under the age of 16. We considered that the length of her dress, her leg and position of the perfume bottle drew attention to her sexuality. Because of that, along with her appearance, we considered the ad could be seen to sexualise a child.”

Continue reading “Dakota Fanning’s Banned Perfume Ad”

Do You Smell Bad? Take This Pill, Hippie Scum

Are you a hippie who can’t be bothered to take showers more than once a week? Do you hate that when you spray perfume into the air it goes into your mouth and eyes and doesn’t spread evenly over your clothes?

Well, there’s a solution, which may soon hit shelves. Dutch artist Lucy McRae and biologist Sheref Mansy are currently working on developing perfume in capsule form.

Continue reading “Do You Smell Bad? Take This Pill, Hippie Scum”

Beyonce’s Fetus Is A Diva, Dislikes Jay-Z’s Aroma

Beyonce, who revealed she was pregnant during the tail end of August, admits that she is turned off by the way he smells. Yes, Beyonce’s fetus is already shaping up to be a huge diva.

The former Destiny’s Child singer revealed that Jay-Z’s odor is repellent to her now, while promoting her new perfume, Pulse:

“I smell everything. If it smells bad, I smell it. My husband’s fragrance, his one that I always love, I hate right now. So thank God I have this one!”

I wonder if this is one of those momentarily reversals, like if being pregnant caused her to dislike Jay-Z’s cologne suddenly, maybe it also caused her to enjoy smells that she formerly hated?…

Continue reading “Beyonce’s Fetus Is A Diva, Dislikes Jay-Z’s Aroma”

Snooki Wanted To Be Doused In Pickle Juice

August 30, 2011 Jersey Shore cast member Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi visited the Jay Leno show and casually explained how she nearly decided to have her new perfume smell exactly like pickles.

Remember those Lay’s Pickle Chips that seem a little elusive these days? It would be like when you eat those chips and the pickle dust gets all over your hands. Or like a pickle juice shower? One I imagine Britney Spears taking during pregnancy.

Snooki axed the idea after she realized that it was ‘gross’ and “Smelled like pickles and grass,” deciding instead to go with “Flirty and bubbly…and obviously DTF.” (Like her personality)

Continue reading “Snooki Wanted To Be Doused In Pickle Juice”