Emma Watson and Prince Harry Aren’t a Thing

Hermione mud bloodSo you heard that Emma Watson and Prince Harry are an item, yes? Well, they’re not. Firstly, Watson is a classy young broad who I’d like to believe has much better taste than that, and second, she said so on Twitter (sort of).

But then again, I wanted to believe that Hermione Granger wouldn’t fall for a certain sweet-yet-clueless ginger with a knack for being dead weight when people are busy trying their hardest to destroy Voldemort. Lesson: anyone lacking the last name “Potter” or “Radcliffe” is a bad choice for her.

Here’s what Watson had to say on social media about not dating a full-blood prince:

The “exclusive” story from Women’s Day Australia detailed a tryst that thrived on “secret dates” and the fact that Harry is “smitten” for more than just “Emma’s looks,” and is instead after her soul because he doesn’t have one.  Continue reading “Emma Watson and Prince Harry Aren’t a Thing”

Angel Haze is WAY More Than Friends With Ireland Baldwin, Get it Right

Angel Haze girlfriend An interview with the Independent more than indicates that lady rapper Angel Haze is really really tired of the media confusing her romance with Ireland Baldwin for a run-of-the-mill friendship.

Haze, who met Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger’s 18-year-old daughter at New York Fashion Week months ago and has been sharing adorable couple-y photos on Instagram ever since, said “I don’t know if there’s like some confirm or deny thing with the way relationships work in the media, but everyone just calls us best friends, best friends for life, like we’re just friends hanging out.”

She called it “funny” but added that it also “sucks,” continuing on with a slightly explicit rant about how “friends don’t f*ck” and to STFU because they definitely do, all the time.

Continue reading “Angel Haze is WAY More Than Friends With Ireland Baldwin, Get it Right”

Tiny Brunette Actress Mila Kunis to Wed Large Brunette Actor Ashton Kutcher

Mila Kunis ringKelso and Jackie from That ’70s Show are engaged according to E! News.

In terms of co-star romances, the pairing of Mila Kunis (soooo good in Black Swan) and Kutcher (sooo okay in movies with the word “effect” and “effects” in the title) isn’t quite as exciting as that of Blair Waldorf and Seth Cohen because The O.C. is a much better show, but let’s review the inane facts anyway…

Significantly taller and less talented Ashton – former flame of Demi Moore – and Mila Kunis, former flame of Macaulay Culkin (you wanted to forget, didn’t you?) – have been dating for two years and the only reason E! thinks they’re engaged is because Kunis was seen wandering around L.A. with “a significant-sized rock on her most significant finger.” A source for Perez Hilton has the deets:

“It won’t be a long engagement. He wants to marry her soon and start their life together. He was planning this all along.”  Continue reading “Tiny Brunette Actress Mila Kunis to Wed Large Brunette Actor Ashton Kutcher”

Colin Farrell Had a Telephone Romance With Elizabeth Taylor

Colin Farrell Elizabeth Taylor ellen Now I will tell you the unexpected tale of how an elder Elizabeth Taylor befriended hunky 30-something Colin Farrell

Taylor sent an orchid to Farrell after she found out he was in the hospital welcoming his son Henry into the world. (She was there having a coronary stent put in.)

Shortly after, the began talking on the phone late at night. Here’s a quote from Vanity Fair, explaining their relationship and why he was asked to speak at her funeral in 2011:

The pair eventually met in person and began exchanging phone calls, especially late-night ones that fit nicely into their insomniac schedules. “She wasn’t much of a sleeper at night like I’m not, so at two o’clock in the morning I’d call her. . .and the nurse would answer the phone. I’d say, ‘Is she awake?’ I’d be on the phone and I’d hear, ‘Hello?’ And I’d go how’s it going and we’d talk for a half an hour an hour into the wee hours. Really cool.’”  Continue reading “Colin Farrell Had a Telephone Romance With Elizabeth Taylor”

Andy Cohen: Sean Avery and I are Platonic Friends!

Sean Avery Andy Cohen instagramThere’s a really amazing[ly hard-to-believe] story that Bravo VP Andy Cohen is dating Elisha Cuthbert’s ex-boyfriend, former New York Ranger Sean Avery.

They are rumored to be secretly engaged after two-and-a-half years of dating, but Cohen insists they are strictly friends without benefits.

“Dude, Sean Avery is straight. Do you understand that? A gay guy and a straight guy should be able to be friends without you asking me if we’re engaged,” he told a paparazzi.

I think the only fucking they’re doing is with the media. In a never-ending game of hash tag, you’re it, Cohen’s response to relationship questions from fans on Twitter is “ask @imseanavery.”

The “I’d be happy if Sean and I were banging” thing also isn’t exactly clear evidence to the contrary…

 

Cher and Tom Cruise Used To Bang Harder Than Illegal Fireworks

Cher Tom cruise dated To wash out the bad taste after Heather Locklear’s snooty Tom Cruise story on Chelsea Lately about his supposedly horrible dance moves, I’ve got a complimentary one for you from Cher.

During a game called “Gypsies, Tramps and Tea” on Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen, Cher said her two-month relationship with a pre-scientology Cruise was “pretty hot and heavy.”

“I’ve had just the greatest lovers ever! … He was in the top five,” she explained.

Cher also told Oprah in 2008 that she was “crazy” about Tom during their steamy mid-’80s fling. Basically she wishes she  could turn back time and be the Elvira to his Dracula for all 365 days of the year.

What would sex between them even look like? He was 23 and she was 39, so I’m assuming she threw him on the ceiling and shot borrowed Village People arrows at his dimples before nap and juice box time.

Tiger Woods’ 5-Iron Officially Entangled in Lindsey Vonn’s Poles

Tiger Woods Lindsey Vonn facebook Sexting and golf champ Tiger Woods and injury-prone skier Lindsey Vonn confirmed the worst-kept secret that is their relationship by posting joint his and her statements along with a series of cheesy looking-off-into-the-distance photos on best-platform-for-secret-shattering Facebook.

Both made sure to mention that their friendship blossomed into a sporty romance in recent months, possibly because she was still technically married to Thomas Vonn up until January 9.

The couple also clarified that no one is frickin’ allowed to ask them about the intimate details. 

Continue reading “Tiger Woods’ 5-Iron Officially Entangled in Lindsey Vonn’s Poles”

Jenny McCarthy on Cousin Melissa McCarthy: ‘Now America Gets to See How Funny She is’

Jenny McCarthy Watch what happens liveIt’s public knowledge that Bridesmaids‘ funny lady Melissa McCarthy and Jenny McCarthy are first cousins. But how close are they? Jenny spoke to Bravo’s Andy Cohen about her relationship with Melissa, who stars in Identity Thief with Jason Bateman (in theaters now) and the upcoming cop comedy The Heat alongside Sandra Bullock.

I’m so proud of Melissa McCarthy. She actually called me when I first started my MTV show, not Singled Out, but my sketch show, and said ‘I’m in New York, I wanna come to L.A., I wanna get a job in acting, I’ve been doing off-Broadway.’ And I said, ‘Well, to get your feet wet you have to start low, so why don’t you come out and be a PA on my sketch show.’  Continue reading “Jenny McCarthy on Cousin Melissa McCarthy: ‘Now America Gets to See How Funny She is’”

Oprah Asks Cissy Houston About Whitney’s Possible Lesbian Tendencies

Whitney Houston's girlfriendIn the new book Remembering Whitney by Cissy Houston, the stern mother of the troubled star wrote that she did not approve of her daughter’s relationship with Robyn Crawford.

Crawford was often linked romantically to Houston without much proof, but Cissy basically spelled it out when she said that kids “want to experiment with all kinds of things.”

Oprah Winfrey asked Houston about it on OWN’s Next Chapter in a less elaborate but equally honest line of questioning, and Cissy still made it clear that she disliked the very idea of it.  Continue reading “Oprah Asks Cissy Houston About Whitney’s Possible Lesbian Tendencies”

Pete Doherty: ‘Amy [Winehouse] And I Were Lovers’

Pete Doherty is opening up about his relationship with Amy Winehouse, telling an interviewer in Paris that they were in love (and late husband Blake Fielder wasn’t the only one she beat the crap out of).

“This is difficult for me to admit. But, yes, it’s true. Amy and I were lovers. I loved her then and, well, I still do today. But towards the end, as only lovers can, she became quite mean and cruel to me.”

“She didn’t suffer fools…and believe me, she had a mean right hook,” the Libertines frontman told the Daily Mail.

Modern-day Kurt and Courtney/Sid and Nancy were photographed together the most in 2008, and Pete recalls a meeting in 2010, so I’m setting a 2008-2010 timeline of on and off friendship/romance.  Continue reading “Pete Doherty: ‘Amy [Winehouse] And I Were Lovers’”

Stories I’m Too Lazy To Write About [11-24-12]

Dexter and Deb, once married in real life, explore romantic in-show relationship. (Huffington Post)

Stalker extraordinaire Puck Rainey (Real World: San Franciscoturns himself in. (TV Guide)

Gangnam Style” is now the most watched video on all of YouTube. (Celebuzz)

Pregnant women – run for the hills/to your bomb shelter, Lindsay wants to adopt. (Evil Beet)

DJ says new Yeah Yeah Yeahs album is coming in spring of 2013! (NME)

Real Housewives star spends her days crying into a bottle of Lexapro. (Radar Online)

Halle Berry’s ex Gabriel Aubry has an extra lumpy black eye, courtesy of Olivier Martinez. (TMZ)

Sesame Street Tainted – Voice Of Elmo Accused Of Sex With 16-Year-Old Boy

I’ll so never look at that little red googly-eyed puppet the same way again…

Kevin Clash, the famous voice of Elmo and star of the documentary Being Elmo: A Puppeteer’s Journeyis being accused of sleeping with an underage boy.

Clash has taken a leave of absence, admitting that there was a relationship but insisting that it didn’t begin until after the man (now 23) turned 18, and NOT when he was 45 and the victim was 16. Lawyers for Sesame Street believed there was not enough evidence to support the claims, which originally surfaced in June.

Continue reading “Sesame Street Tainted – Voice Of Elmo Accused Of Sex With 16-Year-Old Boy”

Jennifer Lawrence and Her Boyfriend Love Beach Volleyball, Asses and Cheetos

In the new issue December edition of Elle Magazine, Jennifer Lawrence discusses her boyfriend, Nicholas Hoult (Skins, X-Men: First Class), and being called “fat.”

Unless Lawrence is harboring some deep secret, like dead kids or baby seals in her closet, I think we can all agree that she’s one of the only famous people under the age of 25 that you should call a role model, mainly for her honesty and ability to laugh off comments that would give most women crippling body image problems.

1. She doesn’t give a fuck if you think she’s too big: “I’m never going to starve myself for a part… I don’t want little girls to be like, ‘Oh, I want to look like Katniss, so I’m going to skip dinner. That’s something I was really conscious of during training, when you’re trying to get your body to look exactly right. I was trying to get my body to look fit and strong – not thin and underfed.”

Continue reading “Jennifer Lawrence and Her Boyfriend Love Beach Volleyball, Asses and Cheetos”

Move Over Courtney Stodden, 12 Year-old Model Dates 24 Year-old Pop Star

Since walking brain hemorrhage Courtney Stodden has turned 18, her TMZ days are numbered to porn offers. It’s time for some fresh lean cut media meat. Canadian model and singer, 12-year-old Akama Miki born to a Japanese mother and Chinese-German father made her relationship public with 24-year old singer Zhang Muyi.

Their “love” was posted on her Chinese Weibo account ( China’s version of Weibo). Her posts say stuff like, “Wait until I’m old enough to marry you, then I’m going to say ‘ I do'”. For the record, I’ve lived in China and that shit is not normal.

The message was responded with Muyi’s response, ” I’m going to be with you as you grow, I’ll always wait for you.”  Continue reading “Move Over Courtney Stodden, 12 Year-old Model Dates 24 Year-old Pop Star”

Ashton Kutcher’s New Ladyfriend

Ashton Kutcher has been spending a lot of time with former Adam Brody flame, Nick & Norah screenwriter Lorene Scafaria. On Sunday the pair went to the L.A. gaming center Ultrazone to play laser tag. Apparently, the dream of the 90s is also alive in Cali.

They also reportedly attended Madonna’s Oscar party a week earlier.

Check out the face paint. Is this rebellion against Demi? like he’s regressing in age now that he’s no longer dating a 49 year-old woman.

At LEAST Scafaria is only a year younger than him. I’d hate to see Ashton steal Selena Gomez right out from under Justin Bieber’s baby chin.

Is EVERYONE Getting Divorced?

Susan Sarandon and not-husband Tim Robbins, Katy Perry and Russell Brand, Zooey Deschanel and Ben Gibbard, Kim Gordon and Thurston Moore, Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher.

Who am I forgetting? Oh yeah, Seal and Heidi Klum! Today TMZ reported that after 7 years the couple will split. Klum will supposedly file for divorce next week.

It’s particularly hard to know if they’re really separating because on one hand Klum posted a happy picture of her and her husband snuggling during a winter vacation in Aspen four weeks ago.

Continue reading “Is EVERYONE Getting Divorced?”

Kat Von D Says ‘I Deserve A Big Fat I Told You So’

Several months now since her breakup with Sandra Bullock’s ex, Jesse James, Kat Von D is spilling new information on James and admitting that everyone was right to assume that he wasn’t going to change or be faithful to her. She also says she’s tired of being confused with Michelle “Bombshell” McGee.

On Sunday night the LA Ink star took to Facebook in a post titled “Thank you, Jesse James,” to let her fans and the public in general know everything she was feeling about her “toxic” relationship. (What else would FB be used for? Keeping in contact with people? Pshhh, never)

Continue reading “Kat Von D Says ‘I Deserve A Big Fat I Told You So’”