Taylor Swift Coughed up a $500 Tip on a Few Bowls of Chicken Parmesan

Taylor Swift italian restaurantTaylor Swift isn’t like her “peers.” She’s not an insufferable little twat like Justin Bieber, she doesn’t do embarrassing shit like twerk with teddy bears (Miley) or appear to be suffering from yet-to-be-discovered vagina bugs like Vanessa Hudgens. Yeah she’s had a lot of boyfriends, but she’s also a good tipper.

So on top of having an arsenal of top 40 hits about her exes, Swifty throws money at waitresses and waiters like Kid Rock at a strip club.

After dining out in Philly with tour mates Ed Sheeran, Austin Mahone and others at the Italian restaurant Ralph’s, Taylor left a $500 tip on an $800 bill, which is a whopping 62%. AND she gave concert tickets to the head chef’s autistic son. And ate a plate of chicken Parmesan that was “almost as big as her,” according to the owner.  Continue reading “Taylor Swift Coughed up a $500 Tip on a Few Bowls of Chicken Parmesan”

Filthy Animal Justin Bieber Pees Wherever He Damn Well Pleases

justin bieber peeing in a bucketIf you didn’t already hate Justin Bieber then I guess nothing – not even a video of him peeing in a bucket inside a restaurant while his entourage laughs like they just saw Chris Rock at the Apollo – will change your mind.

Besides whizzing down the street and giving his neighbors all kinds of palpitations and high blood pressure, the Biebs apparently loves to whizz where’s he’s not supposed to.

On top of that, he disses Bill Clinton – pretty much the coolest president ever – for no apparent reason. On his way out of the “bathroom” (bucket), Justin sprays a picture of Bill with cleaning solution and says “f*ck Bill Clinton!”

JB’s just jealous because Bubba has more swag and intelligence than some Vanilla Ice wannabe with a 2-inch maple wiener.  Continue reading “Filthy Animal Justin Bieber Pees Wherever He Damn Well Pleases”

First-Time Reporter Invites Mila Kunis to the Local Pub, Football Match and Chicken Restaurant

Chris Stark Mila KunisMila Kunis went easy on virginal BBC Radio 1 reporter Chris Stark during what must have been an otherwise exhausting and tedious day of promoting Oz the Great and Powerful. Kunis, who seemed quite cheery despite describing herself as “deathly ill,” spit back adorable sarcasm and genuine interest at each of her young interviewer’s non Oz-related remarks, which were not so much questions but statements.

On top of talking about watching Baywatch and getting naked at weddings, Stark invited Mila to the local bar for Jägerbombs and pints (she requested Blue Moon), later adding layers to the date that included the soccer team he supports (Watford Hornets) and a chicken restaurant called Nando’s.  Continue reading “First-Time Reporter Invites Mila Kunis to the Local Pub, Football Match and Chicken Restaurant”

Bieber Fails Miserably At Reconnecting With Selena G

Ahhh young, indecisive love. It’s been a week since the Biebs split with girlfriend of two years Selena Gomez and they’re meeting for dinner, already thinking about getting back together.

The high-profile duckling pop duo agreed to face each other for sushi at a restaurant in the valley but couldn’t get past ordering virgin sake.  Continue reading “Bieber Fails Miserably At Reconnecting With Selena G”

Cee Lo Denies Involvement In Sexual Battery Case

A woman in L.A. has filed a case against “Fuck You” singer and Gnarls Barkley/Goodie Mob member Cee Lo Green, accusing him of sexually assaulting her.

No one knows the name of the victim, what kind of assault occurred or where  it happened, but sources tell TMZ that detectives have questioned employees of a restaurant in downtown Los Angeles.

Cee Lo aka Thomas DeCarlo Callaway, says he hasn’t been to the restaurant in at least 3 months and that “Nothing ever happened there or anywhere else.”

This better not be true. I love me some Cee Lo. He’s like a floating torso in a white suit.  Seeing him flirt with scantily clad female contestants on The Voice would never be the same.  Continue reading “Cee Lo Denies Involvement In Sexual Battery Case”

Texas Restaurant Gives Two-Cent Discount To The ‘Best Butt’

The Texas restaurant Twisted Root‘s Richardson location is offering two-cent discounts to women with nice butts, and another two-cents if they’re good-looking [in the face?] as well.

An employee at the famously zany burger joint posted the above receipt to Reddit with the message, “I work at Twisted Root! We have these random discounts we can give out for fun.”  Continue reading “Texas Restaurant Gives Two-Cent Discount To The ‘Best Butt’”

Lady Gaga Is Rooting For The Giants, Parent’s Restaurant Sucks

Mrs. Ra Ra, who has been seen at Giants games watering the stands with champagne and Tweeting things like “Giants fan but wow. #Tebow that’s what the fuck a champion looks like” had her photo taken by the glorious Terry Richardson for the millionth time.

Richardson wrote the caption “Lady Gaga holding a football… Go Giants!”

News for Gaga includes this obvious nonsense, that she’s from New York and not voting for the Pats but also that her dad’s restaurant, ‘Joanne Trattoria,’ opened.

Menu items include Papa Joe’s Chicken and Grandma Ronnie’s Meatballs. “Grandma Ronnie” is, by the way, my favorite name ever. I’m going to call one of my nerdy Avernum: Escape From The Pit characters that.  Continue reading “Lady Gaga Is Rooting For The Giants, Parent’s Restaurant Sucks”

69 Year-Old Grandma Scares Away Robber With Knife

Barbara Lane, a restaurant manager in Oregon, was working late when a robber burst in and tried to threaten her. Lane, 69, wasn’t having it. She fought back ferociously, scaring the man off by brandishing a blade.

The Oregonian reports that Barbara Lane was reading a mystery novel behind the counter of the New China Garden Restaurant in SE Portand when a 30-something year-old man wearing a bandana over his face, came in at around midnight. Lane says,

“He just flipped the door open and made a run to jump over the counter. I just automatically grabbed my chair. I was going to hit him with it…”

Continue reading “69 Year-Old Grandma Scares Away Robber With Knife”

Mark & Donnie Wahlberg’s “Wahlburgers” Restaurant

Mark, Donnie and Paul (the unknown chef brother) Wahlberg are opening a burger restaurant in Boston. The brothers already operate the well-known Italian restaurant Alma Nove, and have plans to also start their own pizzeria next Spring.

Wahlburgers will open across from Alma Nove, at Hingham Shipyard in Boston Massachusetts and will include outdoor and indoor seating that can accommodate around 120 guests.

I wonder if the burgers will be named after Mark Wahlberg movies? Or  Marky Mark songs, or New Kids On The Block songs! Oh my god…

Continue reading “Mark & Donnie Wahlberg’s “Wahlburgers” Restaurant”