Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are Done, Over, Finita etc.

Robert Pattinson moving outRobert Pattinson stuffed his favorite grease-stained band tees, guitar picks and biscuits into some Glad trash bags and drove his beard and dogs away from Kristen Stewart’s home in Los Feliz.

(The Spanish-to-English translation of Los Feliz is “The Happy.” Ironic huh?)

Nobody knows exactly why these two split up for the second or third or bajillionth time, but everyone likes to guess. If a bird poops in the air enough he’s bound to hit his target (human female hair) eventually, right?

Certain TMZ employees (and maybe other randoms) think they only got back together for publicity and are splitting now because Breaking Dawn Part 2 is out on DVD. That theory is terrible because the movie came out two months ago.

Others aren’t sure if he was actually moving out or just taking some crap to Goodwill…  Continue reading “Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are Done, Over, Finita etc.”

Twisted Flashback: 5 Most Memorable Celebrity Moments of 2012

Biggest stories of 2012 I like to reminisce about all sorts of thing…. the time I ate a pizza that could easily have fed three John Goodmans, that other time I stepped in a red ant nest and vowed to never put on a dress again, and all the times celebrities wore dresses but forgot underwear.

(Anne Hathaway, thank you for showing me that vaginas can look just as anorexic as collar bones).

Continue reading “Twisted Flashback: 5 Most Memorable Celebrity Moments of 2012”

Robert Pattinson For Italian Vogue, 2012

Robert Pattinson plays peek-a-boo with the camera in a slightly misguided shoot for L’Uome Vogue. Somebody on ONTD! wrote that he looks like “the lovechild of Zorro and Nosferatu.”

Though I really can’t disagree, I’d add that it appears that one of the less mutated Hills Have Eyes lurkers stole from the a drama room costume chest and let his cousin-wife take pictures of him inside the old airplanes and cars that belonged to their victims.

Since text for this one doesn’t exist yet, we’ll go over some random election and Breaking Dawn kissing quotes from Pattinson on Jimmy Kimmel.  Continue reading “Robert Pattinson For Italian Vogue, 2012”

Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson Don’t Care That You’re Sick Of Hearing About Them

Kristen Stewart flashed her armpits at Robert Pattinson after having lunch with him and friends in Hollywood on Monday.

So we can put this discussion away forever right? The constant wondering if they’re back together and why isn’t he dating your Twihard ass instead of her.

They were also spotted by TMZ celebrity birdwatcher types having drinks at the hipstery Ye Rustic Inn pub on Sunday.

Can you imagine Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson walking in to the bar you’re in? Get over the initial shock of seeing two very famous people and think of yourself and your needs.  Continue reading “Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson Don’t Care That You’re Sick Of Hearing About Them”

Kristen Stewart And Robert Pattinson Hung Out Last Weekend

Multiple angry Twihards are going to verbally abuse Kristen Stewart while she’s promoting Breaking Dawn Part 2 and she knows it. That’s why having Robert Pattinson by her side, basically telling fans “hey I forgave her, so you should too” would help.

I say this because many discounted The Sun‘s reports that Robert forgave Kristen for cheating with married Snow White director Rupert Sanders, but now more reputable sources People and E! Online are confirming that the couple have reunited on multiple occasions.

No news on whether or not they had dinner together over the weekend of Sept. 15 because their romance is back on, or if Stewart just wanted to apologize in person.  Continue reading “Kristen Stewart And Robert Pattinson Hung Out Last Weekend”

GMA fails to charm Rob after successful Jon Stewart Show

“I’ve never been interested in selling my personal life, the only reason I go on TV is to promote movies”

That’s RPatz’s way of telling GMA to suck it.

While Rob was clean cut and cute during his ice cream date with Jon Stewart, the Cosmopolis star went back to being his mellow greasy-haired vampire-self on Good Morning America.

Stephanopoulos: Your performance in Cosmopolis is just gripping, and I wanna get to it … but I got to get the elephant out of the room out of the way, uh, everybody wants to know how are you doing? What do you want your fans to know what’s going on in your personal life?  Continue reading “GMA fails to charm Rob after successful Jon Stewart Show”

Robert Pattinson Eats Ice Cream With Jon Stewart, Mostly Avoids Talking About Kristen

Robert Pattinson finally crawled out of his lonely hermit crab shell to begin his promotional tour for Cosmopolis. First stop:
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. Stewart cut right to the chase, feeding Rob’s inner woman some Ben & Jerry’s ice cream, throwing his hands up in the air and saying:

“We’re just a couple of gals talking. The last time I had a bad breakup, Ben and Jerry got me through the tougher times. I thought you and I could bond over this and talk about, ‘boy, you are better off, kick her to the curb.'”  Continue reading “Robert Pattinson Eats Ice Cream With Jon Stewart, Mostly Avoids Talking About Kristen”

Will Ferrell Calls Kristen Stewart ‘A Trampire’

Will Ferrell appeared on TBS’ Conan Thursday evening to promote The Campaign and express his [comedic] feelings about Kristen Stewart’s cheating scandal.

This is actually the third time he’s poked fun at the global unimportance of Robert Pattinson’s heartbreak. He told MTV that Stewart was on his “shitlist,” then a week ago he took to MSNBC’s Morning Joe to talk about the olympics and to say:

“He moved out. Yes, it’s important. I don’t care what’s going on in Syria. This is what’s happening here. She made out with a director – the director’s married…Rob Pattinson said, ‘That’s enough.’ It’s a sin.”

Continue reading “Will Ferrell Calls Kristen Stewart ‘A Trampire’”

Kristen Stewart And Robert Pattinson Still Have To Promote The Hell Out Of ‘Breaking Dawn: Part 2’

Catwoman told Bruce Wayne that “there’s a storm coming” and that seems to fit with this whole Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart debacle.

This time, there’s another storm coming. Besides the original cheating scandal photos and the public apology and Robert Pattinson moving out and saying he wants to have a chat with Rupert Sanders…

I’m talking about the final promotional tour for the Twilight franchise. These two have to co-present at the 2012 VMAs, and go to various premieres in L.A., New York and London not to mention photo shoots and other random events.

Breaking Dawn: Part 2 is in theaters November 16 but the appearances begin with the MTV Video Music Awards on September 6.  Continue reading “Kristen Stewart And Robert Pattinson Still Have To Promote The Hell Out Of ‘Breaking Dawn: Part 2’”

Robert Pattinson Moved Out, All ‘Angry’ And ‘Heartbroken’

People magazine has confirmed that Robert Pattinson moved out, far away from the apartment he shared with Kristen Stewart. Actually, we don’t know if he officially moved out, but he did leave.

A “source” said “I’m not sure they’ll be able to recover from this,” and mentioned that Rob is “heartbroken and angry.”

Do we really need sources to tell us these things? WOW, I’m so surprised that Robert Pattinson is sad after his girlfriend cheated on him with a married man. He’s probably questioning forgiving her because he’d constantly be wondering if his ball hairs were grey enough for her.

Continue reading “Robert Pattinson Moved Out, All ‘Angry’ And ‘Heartbroken’”

Kristen Stewart Issues Public Apology For Cheating On Robert Pattinson With A Married Man

I heard about Kristen Stewart‘s “affair” with the director of Snow White and the Huntsman yesterday before I went to see The Dark Knight Rises (which would have been terrible without Anne Hathaway and Joseph Gordon-Levitt) and shrugged it off as rumor.

Cheating scandals in the news are easy to disregard, especially when “a source” or multiple anonymous sources are involved.

I read that there was a picture of K-Stew sucking face with married 41-year-old Rupert Sanders and couldn’t find it – another reason I thought it was fabricated by imaginative reporters. Alas, it wasn’t some Star or Weekly World News story.  Continue reading “Kristen Stewart Issues Public Apology For Cheating On Robert Pattinson With A Married Man”

Trailer: Breaking Dawn – Part 2

The one thing that both Twilight fans and haters can rejoice over – the final chapter, Breaking Dawn Part 2! Like The Matrix Revolutions and Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows before it (and The Hunger Games: Mockingjay), the last in a series is usually the most action-heavy.

There’s usually some kind of war and a conclusion to a drawn-out conflict. In this case it’s Bella and Edward’s baby causing problems with the ancient Italian vampire council, The VolturiContinue reading “Trailer: Breaking Dawn – Part 2”

Johnny Depp Is The Alpha Vampire

Johnny Depp has played a pirate, a talking lizard, a demon barber, Ichabod Crane, Ed Wood, Don Juan, Willy Wonka, The Mad Hatter, Edward Scissorhands.

Oh, and he made his debut in Nightmare On Elm Street.

Now he’s taking on a role more versatile than any, a vampire. Everyone in Hollywood from Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise to Gary Oldman, Kiefer Sutherland and Kate Beckinsale have filled those bloodsucking shoes.

The latest is Depp in the eerie 70’s comedy Dark Shadows. At the London premiere he took a shot at one of the most lusted after vamps of recent years, Robert Pattinson.

“There’s room for two vampires on this block – as long as he remembers I am the Alpha Vampire,” he told US Weekly reporters.  Continue reading “Johnny Depp Is The Alpha Vampire”

Will Robert Pattinson And David Cronenberg’s ‘Cosmopolis’ Lay Twilight To Rest?

There’s an official nudity-heavy teaser trailer for Robert Pattinson’s latest movie, Cosmopolis.

 It is directed by David Cronenberg (The Fly, Eastern Promises) and co-stars Jay Baruchel, Samantha Morton, Paul Giamatti and Juliette Binoche.

The movie is based on Don Delillo’s novel about Eric Packer, a 28 year-old millionaire who is being pursued by two threats and begins to lose his fortune on his adventures within a day in Manhattan.

It does have one thing in common with Twilight, it’s filmed in Canada. Toronto, to be exact. “I’ve never shot a foot of film in the U.S., even though a lot of my movies are set there,” Cronenberg told students during a lecture at Queens University.  Continue reading “Will Robert Pattinson And David Cronenberg’s ‘Cosmopolis’ Lay Twilight To Rest?”

People’s Choice Fashions, You Be The Judge

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Many stars of music, television and movies showed up for the 2012 People’s Choice Awards, hosted by The Big Bang Theory’s Kaley Cuoco. From Robert Pattinson’s shaved head to Emma Stone’s Emerald City Gucci suit.

Continue reading “People’s Choice Fashions, You Be The Judge”

Kristen Stewart’s Gives Thoughtful Gifts, Spends $12,000 On Guitars For R-Patz

The money clearly is no issue, when you consider Kristen Stewart‘s salary for Twilight and note that most celebrities just buy each other cars and diamonds. Though she could afford to buy Robert Pattinson a Range Rover or a lovely diamond necklace, vintage guitars are a bit more heartfelt. Just a bit. Barely.

While some people might take this as a personal message from K-Stew to R-Patz about his career choice and rumored affair, such as “please take these instruments and pursue this instead because you hanging out with groupies is still better than sluts like Nikki Reed,” I think it’s less complex.

Continue reading “Kristen Stewart’s Gives Thoughtful Gifts, Spends $12,000 On Guitars For R-Patz”