Boat Full of Diseased Rats Headed for the UK

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News of an abandoned cruise ship full of nothing but infected rats hit the web today.

After letting Bieber out of its sight, Canada is at strike two for doing nothing about the ghost ship full of hundreds of rats, who have “been eating each other to survive,” according to The Independent.

The diseased cannibal rats are currently sitting on a boat that was originally built in Yugoslavia in the mid-’70s for sightseeing cruises to remote, icy locations is now headed straight for the UK, you know, because Canadians are secretly cruel and want to remind England of all the sickly grey bodies that piled high in the streets during the rodent-spread plague of the 14th century.  Continue reading “Boat Full of Diseased Rats Headed for the UK”

Australian Billionaire To Build Titanic II

Famous investor and owner of Mineralogy, Clive Palmer of Queensland, is planning on building a more modern version of the Titanic, called Titanic II. Oddly not a reference that straight-to-DVD sequel from 2010.

I have a sinking feeling about this one. And now so do you, concerning my Laffy Taffy jokes.

Besides it having “state-of-the-art 21st century technology and the latest navigation and safety systems” which Palmer mentioned in a statement, it will be constructed in China and not Ireland, like it’s cursed ancestor. It will, however, have the same dimensions and a course from England to New York sometime in 2016.

Continue reading “Australian Billionaire To Build Titanic II”

Costa Concordia Disaster Gift To Survivors: 30% Off Next Cruise

The owners of the cruise ship Costa Concordia, which crashed into a rock off the coast of Italy, capsized  and claimed the lives of at least 12 people, have decided to offer survivors a special deal.

Not only will their ticket price be fully refunded but they will receive thirty percent off the price of their next cruise!

The hope is to “stave of lawsuits” which would likely cost the company (Costa Crociere) thousands of dollars.  Continue reading “Costa Concordia Disaster Gift To Survivors: 30% Off Next Cruise”