The Best/Worst Halloween Costumes Of 2012

I love Halloween for the candy corn, roasted pumpkin seeds, and horror movies even though lately I’ve come to expect only disappointing Paranormal Activity and Saw sequels.

October is national Bullying Awareness Month, so I urge you to not throw rubber insulin needles at the 4,000 people who will incur diabetes on this day, mostly because one of them could be me.

I’m not wondering what I should dress up as this year, because I’ve been interested in avoiding attention-drawing activities ever since I was a wallflower egg hiding from aggressive fist-pumping sperm in my mother’s fallopian tubes.

Continue reading “The Best/Worst Halloween Costumes Of 2012”

Here Are Some Creepy, Predatory Things Rupert Sanders Said About Kristen Stewart

We haven’t heard from or seen much of Snow White And The Huntsman director Rupert Sanders since he publicly apologized for having an affair with Kristen Stewart.

Here are some really eyebrow-raising things he said about Kristen in an interview (conducted before the scandal) with Vogue UK.

It’s kind of what you’d expect a really inappropriately enamored 41-year-old to say about a 22-year-old-girl…

“She’d burnt her lower pelvis area, quite low down. She was bandaging a bad burn there, in her very tight jeans, with a Camel clamped between her teeth. That was my very first image of her.”

“She’s got this masculine edge. She’s like this beautiful tomboy or something. What surprised me most when I met Kristen was how unlike the character of Bella Swan she was in real life.”  Continue reading “Here Are Some Creepy, Predatory Things Rupert Sanders Said About Kristen Stewart”

‘Snow White And The Huntsman’ Trailer And Posters!

I know there’s been a lot of hype about the new Snow White movie, and let’s face it, the Kristen Stewart/Charlize Theron/Chris Hemsworth one is the real deal. Not this Julia Roberts Mirror, Mirror” contender that didn’t even have a name until a few weeks ago.

Until now I’d been half-heartedly promoting Snow White And The Hunstman with all the clearly high-budget stills of K-Stew looking like a character in Skyrim but now I see what the fuss is about! This trailer isn’t messing around, Charlize Theron looks like class act up there.

The queen always was the classically insecure woman. The girl with all the faux confidence, addicted to shiny surfaces. These days it’s the girl on the bus gazing into her iPhone – you know, the one with the black screen.

If only we could all just poison people who visually threaten us, tempt them with cyanide-flavored Pinkberry. That’d be good population control too, because half the world would suddenly evaporate. You know you’re that shallow.

Continue reading “‘Snow White And The Huntsman’ Trailer And Posters!”

Hey, Snow White Isn’t Supposed To Smoke!

Photos of Kristen Stewart shooting her potentially epic fantasy/adventure film Snow White And The Huntsman have arrived!

She’s getting all friendly with the equine scene in armor and fagging it up (fags= cigs, not men who love Disney movies).

As usual, she looks a little flummoxed, but that’s how we recognize her, right?

It wouldn’t be Kristen without that shy look of discomfort. Though the is the last person who should be smoking, she looks deader than dinosaurs, mincemeat pie and Anne Heche…

Continue reading “Hey, Snow White Isn’t Supposed To Smoke!”