Turns Out, Uneducated Pervs DIDN’T Try to Ruin Emma Watson’s Awesome Speech On Feminism

You may have heard about Emma Watson’s extremely insightful and empowering speech to the U.N., which was about equality and feminism being one and the same.

You ALSO may have heard that a bunch of trolls threatened to leak naked pictures of Watson to somehow make her seem like less of a feminist.

The people behind the countdown to Watson’s nude leak were actually a marketing group hired to shut down 4Chan and end the constant invasion of privacy from the hackers behind the Jennifer Lawrence scandal.  Continue reading “Turns Out, Uneducated Pervs DIDN’T Try to Ruin Emma Watson’s Awesome Speech On Feminism”

Everyone is Gay For Gay Ellen Page

Ellen page time to thriveAdorable actress Ellen Page announced the other day at an LGBT conference that she is gayer than a unicorn climbing up a rainbow with a dick in its mouth, spouting a really awe and aw inspiring speech about how she was tired of lying to herself, her friends and the public. Page said she felt “a personal obligation and a social responsibility” to tell the truth.

“I am tired of hiding and I am tired of lying by omission,” she said. “I suffered for years because I was scared to be out. My spirit suffered, my mental health suffered and my relationships suffered. And I’m standing here today, with all of you, on the other side of all that pain. I am young, yes, but what I have learned is that love, the beauty of it, the joy of it and yes, even the pain of it, is the most incredible gift to give and to receive as a human being. And we deserve to experience love fully, equally, without shame and without compromise.”  Continue reading “Everyone is Gay For Gay Ellen Page”

Jodie Foster Says You’re Dumb For Expecting a Jodie Foster Coming-Out Speech, is Not Retiring

Jodie Foster Coming Out SpeechEven though Jodie Foster knows that anyone who needs her to tell them she’s gay to believe it has to have the brain cells of a collard green, she finally decided to address the issue publicly in a very touching, very in-your-face speech at the 70th annual Golden Globes on Sunday.

“I hope you’re not disappointed that there won’t be a big coming out speech tonight, because I already did my coming out about a thousand years ago, back in the stone age,” Foster told a surprised, laughter-filled audience during her acceptance of the Cecille B. DeMille Lifetime Achievement Award.

Foster joked that she is “not Honey Boo Boo Child,” and that isn’t a travesty because her reality show would be “so boring,” then continued on about privacy being a thing of the past.  Continue reading “Jodie Foster Says You’re Dumb For Expecting a Jodie Foster Coming-Out Speech, is Not Retiring”

Coming Soon to IMAX: Queen Elizabeth’s Christmas Speech!

Queen Elizabeth red coatFirst the Pope joins Twitter, and now the Queen is in 3D. What’s next, The Celebrity Apprentice in space? The Guardian is reporting that Sky News (who have recently added 3D golf and soccer to their programming), will broadcast Queen Elizabeth II’s speech on Christmas day in 3D.

“What’s the highlight of her speech? Like she’s going to give one hand gesture and people will be like ‘Remember when the hand came at you?'” Chelsea Lately round table member Ryan Stout wondered.

A spokeswoman for the palace said The Queen “agreed straight away” and needed no convincing to have her likeness glaring and waving her finger in an extra dimension on Jesus’ birthday.  Continue reading “Coming Soon to IMAX: Queen Elizabeth’s Christmas Speech!”

Obama Calls Out Mitt’s Backtracking, Labels It ‘Romnesia’

At a speech in Virginia at George Mason University yesterday afternoon Obama addressed his running opponent Mitt Romney‘s “backtracking” and “sidestepping” ways, humorously labeling the condition “Romnesia.”

Here are the symptoms, so nobody else catches it:

If you say you’re for equal pay for equal work, but you keep refusing to say whether or not you’d sign a bill that protects equal pay for equal work – you might have Romnesia.

If you say women should have access to contraceptive care, but you support legislation that would let your employer deny you contraceptive care – you might have a case of Romnesia.  Continue reading “Obama Calls Out Mitt’s Backtracking, Labels It ‘Romnesia’”

Stories I’m Too Lazy To Write About [9-1-12]

Twitter is “Eastwooding” after Clint’s ranty RNC chair speech (Huffington Post)

Colorado shooter James Holmes called hospital just minutes before massacre. (Fox)

Justin Bieber causes paparazzi car crash on Ventura Blvd. (TMZ)

Some assholes stole Grimes’ gear at Manchester venue. (ONTD!)

Kristen Stewart’s parents are getting a divorce. (E! Online)

Twilight star Kellan Lutz dislikes Twilight, prefers Generation Kill. (Ok!)

Joss Whedon says The Avengers is ‘not a great movie’ (NME)

Take notes Rihanna, Chad Johnson‘s wife, Evelyn Lozada, is “afraid.” (ABC)

Some assholes stole Grimes’ gear at a Manchester venue. (ONTD!)

Clint, I Love You, But WTF Are You Talking About?

Clint Eastwood, who announced his support for Mitt Romney August 3, opened for the presidential candidate at the Republican National Convention on Thursday with a rant less easy to understand than stroked-out Gary Busey.

I THINK he was trying to say that Romney will help the economy, and even though Obama’s enthusiasm in 2004 made him cry (“I
haven’t cried that hard since I found out that there are 23 million unemployed people in this country”), he’s sick of the broken promises.

Being the biggest female Clint Eastwood fan in the entire world, I can only hope that he was stumbling over his words (and talking to inanimate objects BESIDES Paul Ryan) to appeal to his audience.  Continue reading “Clint, I Love You, But WTF Are You Talking About?”