Stories I’m Too Lazy To Write About [8-18-12]

Ryan Lochte in a speedo. What happens in Vegas lives on forever in photography. (Las Vegas Sun)

And here’s half-naked Ryan (again) peeing on Joan Rivers. (E! Online)

Taylor Swift and Conor Kennedy, also in swimwear. (Radar)

Here’s why children shouldn’t play baseball. (Yahoo!)

Lady Gaga is doing better. Says past year was “a challenge.” (NME)

Guess whose girlfriend likes attention? Michael Phelps‘ obviously. (Daily Mail)

Kanye’s dancers almost crash a plane. (Stereogum)

Speaking of attention, Kim Kardashian has new Playboy outtakes to show you. (Celebuzz)

Coach Brett Favre is a winner. (USA Today)

Elton John shows Michael Caine his Mars Rover, proves other planets are surrounded by water. (Mirror)

 

Stories I’m Too Lazy To Write About [8-14-12]

Michael Phelps in a speedo, this time it’s for Louis Vuitton. [SF Gate]

Residents of Bellingham do not want to share their Costco with Canadians. [Huffington Post]

Anderson Cooper and talk show host Andy Cohen are vacationing together. [Gawker]

Be jealous. Everyone in Colorado is skinny. [Yahoo!]

Chad Johnson’s wife beats Kim at short marriage game, divorces after 41 days. [NY Daily News]

Thank you Brad Paisley for knocking Scotty McCreery off the stage. [Us Weekly]

Christina Aguilera has purple(ish) hair. [Reality TV Magazine]

Pennsylvania woman poisons husband with Visine. [The Record Herald]

17-foot-snake discovered in the Everglades (good thing I already had no desire to visit). [L.A. Times]

Rest in peace Welcome Back, Kotter’s Ron Palillo [People]

Rod Stewart Is The Latest Cast Member Of ‘The Real L Word’

A lot of men turn into lesbians when they get older. It’s not a judgment or a speculation, it’s just the truth. Kyle MacLachlan, Bret Michaels, Bruce Jenner, Mick Jagger, Val Kilmer, and Steven Tyler are all victims of it.

The testosterone diminishes, beers are thrown back as the metabolism slows and the pectoral muscles morph into lusciously hairy b-cups.

This happened to Rod Stewart a long time ago, I’m not sure exactly when, but I’m sure he’s aware of it and just kind of said “fuck it, I’m a 67-year-old rock star and my wife’s a model with bad vision, it no longer matters if I wear a speedo show my tits to strangers on the beach.”  Continue reading “Rod Stewart Is The Latest Cast Member Of ‘The Real L Word’”