Stories I’m Too Lazy To Write About [1-30-13]

Ray Lewis angry purple hulk OF COURSE Ray Lewis puts illegal muscle-growing antler extract on his tongue. (Deadspin)

Ashley Judd and her husband Daria have mutually ended their marriage. (People)

Surfer Garrett McNamara rode a 100-foot wave in Portugal and didn’t die. (Daily Beast)

John Mayer creeping towards Girls star Allison Williams like the blob. (Jezebel)

I would not recommend watching the video of the Cuban baby getting a tattoo. (IB Times)

Jason London looks like a gluten-free blueberry muffin after Arizona bar fight. (TMZ)

All the Steve Job makeup in the world can’t save Ashton Kutcher‘s performance. (Gizmodo