Damn It, I Was Hoping Michael Vick’s Hand Was Broken

During a game against the New York Giants in Philadelphia, it was reported that Michael Vick broke his hand after what he claims was a late hit by Chris Canty.

The team physician for The Eagles determined the injury on Sunday during the game, but it was later ruled to be a severely bruised bone with problematic swelling.

As much as I love the Eagles I was really rooting for his hand to be broken, since I HATE him. Besides being a sadistic dog-killer, he complains too much…

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Cyndi Lauper Flubs National Anthem

Cyndi Lauper is the latest pop singer to make a mistake during a rendition of “The Star-Spangled Banner.” Hers occurred today at the U.S. Open. (Sunday, September 11th)

During a certain description of our flag, she sang “O’er the ramparts, we watched as our flag was still streaming.” Leaving out one lyric “gallantly,” streaming.

That song is so damn hard to memorize. That’s why at sporting events I just mouth the word “watermelon,” over and over again…

Lauper has now joined the likes of Christina Aguilera, Stevie Ray Vaughan, Roseanne Barr and Michael Bolton in the National Anthem fuck-up hall of fame.

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Taylor Swift’s Exes Still Go To Her Concerts

Taylor Swift must be even more classy and magnetizing than we all thought, because both Taylor Lautner and Joe Jonas have been spotted at her concerts lately.

Joe was actually at two different Swifty concerts in L.A., once on August 28 (Sunday) after he showed his grizzly face at the VMAs and then again on September 1.

She also gave a shout-out before her song “Back To December” to her ex Taylor Lautner, who was also in the audience with Joe Jonas, on Sunday the 28th!

She even gave Taylor Jacob Wolfpants Lautner a hug after the show! (below)

Guess who else was there? Reese Witherspoon, Jake Gyllenhaal’s ex. (Who Taylor ALSO dated)

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Matthew Fox Punched A Lady In The Boob

Sunday August 28, Lost and Party Of  Five star Matthew Fox, 45, punched a female bus driver in her boob, arm and groin.

29 year-old Heather Bormann filed an official complaint yesterday, charging him with assault.

She has photographic proof of her injuries and Matthew will almost certainly be apprehended in some way for his offense.

The altercation started when he tried to climb aboard the a bus that was booked by a bachelor party that he was not invited to.

After he stepped onboard and was asked to leave, he swung at her. She also reported that he smelled strongly of alcohol and that she swung back!
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Naked True Blood Recap (NSFW)

Today’s episode of True Blood, like many others, had its fair share of nudity, perhaps the most from Anna Paquin that we’ve ever seen. Eric and Sookie drink eachother’s blood and go on one of those V-trips that we’ve become familiar with after season 1, where Jason (Ryan Kwanten) and Amy (Lizzie Caplan) laid around topless, devouring vials of V as if they were In-N-Out cheeseburgers.

NOW Sookie (Paquin) and newly reformed vampire Eric (Alexander Skarsgard) are living together, and swapping blood. What would the Department of Health And Human Services have to say about that? This show needs all sorts of disclaimers for people who are prone to become out of touch with reality.

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