Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Winter 2013 [Photos]

Kate Upton has been busy standing still for Vogue Italia, defending her body, being the face of Accessorize jewelry and filming non-kissy Super Bowl commercials, but was completely happy to return to her Sports Illustrated roots for a second swimsuit issue cover.

Okay, maybe not as happy as last year, considering they sent her to Antarctica instead of sunny Australia.

In a Today Show interview, 20-year-old Upton said the location in general was beautiful but the shoot “wasn’t great” because she’s from Florida and had probably only previously seen ice and snow in Scholastic pop-up books. “When I came back I was losing hearing and eyesight because my body was shutting down, it was working so hard to keep warm. I was thinking warm thoughts,” she told Matt Lauer on Feb 12.  Continue reading “Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Winter 2013 [Photos]”

No Really, Britney Spears Looks Good!

How many times have we, the media, said “hey guys, Britney Spears is back in shape”?

I think this might only be the 80th time.

It has happened each time she’s gone back on tour since 2004’s meltdown. Also, when she started her job as a judge on X-Factor and every single time someone catches her in a bikini. Not to mention that Fantasy perfume Cleopatra thing.

I don’t think agreeing if Britney Spears is the most repulsive person alive or just another completely above-average person walking around in L.A is something we can do as a nation.

You have to accept that she never look like she did at the VMA’s with that snake draped over her shoulders. This recent photo from Facebook [insert “it’s Britney, beach” joke here] does seem to confirm the above average attractiveness bit. She asks: Continue reading “No Really, Britney Spears Looks Good!”

Lindsay Lounges Around In A Swimsuit Reading O Magazine, Not At All Posing For Cameras

I would apologize for making fun of two different swimsuit-wearing celebrities with embarrassing bodies (that’s a show in the UK by the way, please check out the penis gallery) in one day, but I’m not sorry.

Lindsay Lohan and Rod Stewart are funny looking, and I’m 12 and feel the need to point and laugh. Also, I don’t know about you, but I’ve never seen this many groin freckles in my life.

It’s like a celestial map of a yet-to-be-discovered galaxy of ginger planets.  Continue reading “Lindsay Lounges Around In A Swimsuit Reading O Magazine, Not At All Posing For Cameras”

Just In Case You Weren’t 100% Sure That Megan Fox Was Carrying David Silver’s Baby…

Several months ago, Brian Austin Green tossed a fastball covered in tadpoles into Jennifer’s Body. After not answering yes or no to curious reporters, Megan Fox‘s status a pregnant woman has been confirmed by visual proof.

She and Green visited Kona, Hawaii for their wedding anniversary and Fox was photographed in a bikini with little David Silver kissing her belly like it held the Khaleesi’s second son.

Speaking of second children, this is the Beverly Hills 90210 star’s second child. His first, 10-year-old Kassius, was conceived with ex-wife Vanessa Marcil.  Continue reading “Just In Case You Weren’t 100% Sure That Megan Fox Was Carrying David Silver’s Baby…”

Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Winter 2012 [Photos]

Are you a horny man and/or jealous woman? Look no further, I have just the thing for you. A gallery of photos from the gigantic bible of airbrushed swimsuit models, Sports Illustrated’s annual Swimsuit issue is out in all its shiny, international glory.

2012’s magazine features girls named Kirby, Bar and “Cintia Dicker” who are simultaneously getting revenge on all the grade/high school kids who made fun of their lanky bodies and strange names.

These girls visited Australia, Panama, Seychelles (in the Indian Ocean) the Gulf Coast of the United States and Zambia in Southern Africa.

So, if you notice a bunch of lions, elephants, giraffes and zebras chilling in the background, that’s why.  Continue reading “Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Winter 2012 [Photos]”

Man Breaks Into Daycare, Puts On Pink Child-Sized Bikini

A man in Indiana broke into the Kidscape Learning Center just after 10 p.m. on October 20th, where he was seen via surveillance camera, trying on children’s swimsuits.

He found one that he preferred (a pink two piece) and walked around the daycare center for about 10 minutes until he apparently got bored, jumped over a counter, set off the motion detector, changed out of the swimsuit and left.

Continue reading “Man Breaks Into Daycare, Puts On Pink Child-Sized Bikini”

Keep Your Shirt On, Julia Roberts

Julia Roberts, 43, went for a beachside romp yesterday in Hawaii with Danny Moder (her husband) and their three children. I know she’s only relaxing and taking a day off, not at a photo shoot, but I gotta say, Julia, you look much much better with your shirt on.

Like  as in good! The shirt is good, I’d be like, “Julia Roberts is a cougar,” but then shirt off I’m like “Ohhh nooo, she’s as floppy as Larry Crowne was at the box office.”