Bella Makes Her Final Kristen Stewart Face – ‘Breaking Dawn Part 2’ is Over

On Sunday I dragged my withered tuckus to a matinée of Breaking Dawn – Part 2.

I saw the past three movies in the theater (New Moon made Eclipse look like it was based on a Pulitzer finalist) and therefore felt obligated to see the final installment.

Yes I like the series, no I don’t like admitting it.

I stopped reading the books after Jacob made Bella’s baby his future wife using only his eyes. It was very monarchical, and maybe the last misguided-stab-at-romance straw. But that’s what Twilight is, right?  Continue reading “Bella Makes Her Final Kristen Stewart Face – ‘Breaking Dawn Part 2’ is Over”

Pattinsquatch Intimidated By Taylor Llamautner’s Bod

Elusive english Sasquatch Robert Pattinson revealed to the Latin magazine 15a20 that he was insecure about his sex scene with Kristen Stewart because of how hard Taylor Lautner (Llamautner) works out for his slutty werewolf role…

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Kristen Stewart’s Glamour Magazine Doily Dress

K-Stew is the face of November’s Glamour Magazine, wearing only combat boots and her grandmother’s doily.

Stephenie Meyer, the Pacific Northwestern Mormon queen of fictional vampire pregnancies and tall sweating werewolves, conducted the interview – which taught us who Kristen prefers to watch Twilight movies with.

“It’s fun to watch with [Taylor] because we actually sit and watch it, me and Taylor are actual ‘Twilight’ fans, so we can sit there and be totally into it! Whereas I sit there with Rob [Pattinson]…he likes it, but he has just such a different energy.”

Yeah. Llamas are fun to watch TV with, so much more cuddly than big-haired Brits with quidditch brooms in their asses. By the way, want to hear Kristen’s relationship advice?…

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Taylor Lautner’s Identical Llama Twin

Credit for this photo comparison goes to Pajiba.com and Dustin Rowles, who posted it the other day, thus jolting me to also do so. I just wanted to point out the similarities.

There really are no similarities to point out, because that would imply that there are actually differences besides the llama being cuter than Taylor Lautner

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Taylor Swift’s Exes Still Go To Her Concerts

Taylor Swift must be even more classy and magnetizing than we all thought, because both Taylor Lautner and Joe Jonas have been spotted at her concerts lately.

Joe was actually at two different Swifty concerts in L.A., once on August 28 (Sunday) after he showed his grizzly face at the VMAs and then again on September 1.

She also gave a shout-out before her song “Back To December” to her ex Taylor Lautner, who was also in the audience with Joe Jonas, on Sunday the 28th!

She even gave Taylor Jacob Wolfpants Lautner a hug after the show! (below)

Guess who else was there? Reese Witherspoon, Jake Gyllenhaal’s ex. (Who Taylor ALSO dated)

Continue reading “Taylor Swift’s Exes Still Go To Her Concerts”