Ronda Rousey Dated a Guy Who Repeatedly Banged His Teeth Into Hers

Ronda Rousey teethAfter being approached by one of TMZ’s professional celebrity-harassers, MMA legend Ronda Rousey explained what she’s looking for in a man. (Self-confidence, Zzz.)

She also launched into a very interesting story about a seemingly perfect guy who she called “catalog man” who turned her off with his unconventional kissing habits.

He would bite my teeth. Like, his teeth would hit my teeth when we kissed. It’s the worst! At first I was like, “Oh, it’s an accident” but then it started happening over and over and over. … He was absolutely perfect in every way except for that but that was just a dealbreaker. You can’t hit your teeth on my teeth! 

Continue reading “Ronda Rousey Dated a Guy Who Repeatedly Banged His Teeth Into Hers”

The Next Time Your Parents Disapprove of Your Piercings, Show Them This…

huge cheek gauges Are you a young person whose parents are on the fence about you getting some measly bellybutton or industrial piercing? I think I may have a solution. Show them a picture of this German guy with 36mm cheek gauges

There’s a chance they’ll think whatever you want is just a gateway piercing to having your teeth show through the side of your face like post-burn Harvey Dent, but it’s worth a shot.

23-year-old Joel Miggler can stick his tongue out the holes and blow mass amounts of smoke out of them, looking very much like a human gas mask. I’m also pretty sure that at least 20% of the food he puts in his mouth falls right back out.

 

Video: Miley Cyrus – “Adore You”

Androgynous rodent Miley Cyrus continues to make us very, very uncomfortable in the “Adore You” video where she expresses how much she misses Liam Hemsworth by caressing her own teeth.

The massive pearly white chompers – along with the nose, shoulders and unhappy trail – are apparently Miley’s erogenous zones. ..The more you know.

Stories I’m Too Lazy To Write About [12-22-12]

Megan fox teeth This is 40Leslie Mann felt protective of Megan Fox and her boobs in This is 40. (Yahoo!/Deadspin)

Ashton Kutcher finally divorced Demi Moore after she failed to pull the trigger. (Celebuzz)

National Enquirer says Daniel Radcliffe fell hard off the wagon. (Evil Beet)

Simon Cowell coughed up $20,000 when Fifth Harmony lost The X Factor. (Inquisitr)

I think Tom Hardy as Mad Max is more, pale Roland from Borderlands. (ohmyGAHH!)

Christopher Lee (Saruman the White) has a Heavy Metal Christmas album. (Spin)

No one out-sings LeAnn Rimes, especially not sober 13-year-old Carly Rose Sonenclar. (TMZ)

Crazed Female Fan Sinks Piranha Teeth Into Danny Bonaduce

Redheaded child star turned beefy ginger hulk reality D-lister/radio personality Danny Bonaduce made an appearance in a Washington casino last Friday where he was greeted by one very sharp-toothed fan who had to be removed by force from his freckled flesh.

“First lady in line says ‘I love your radio show. I loved you on the Partridge Family. Can you kiss me?’ And I said, ‘Sure,'” and she leaned in grabbed both hands around my head and just went WAAA [indicates to face],” Bonadouchey told CNN.

“They were tiny little Chucky teeth. Man, they just gnawed like piranhas,” he said. “People are trying to pull her off me … I’m screaming like a baby.”  Continue reading “Crazed Female Fan Sinks Piranha Teeth Into Danny Bonaduce”

Jewel As June Carter Cash In Yet Another Lifetime Biopic

So, I’ve bombarded you with pictures of Andre 3000 as Jimmy Hendrix, Lindsay Lohan as Liz Taylor. Maybe it’s too much, but here’s something to chase the bitter image of Lindsay’s sad attempt to not be a freckled skeleton wrapped in leather right out of your head…

Jewel looking pretty and fresh as June Carter Cash in a Lifetime biopic based on the book Anchored in Love: An Intimate Portrait of June Carter Cash. 

Last week, Foo Fighters drummer Taylor Hawkins was cast as Iggy Pop in the CBGB. I happen to think Jewel as June is better casting even though they don’t look that much alike. Reese Witherspoon didn’t either and still did a great job.

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Scorned Polish Dentist Extracts All Her Ex-Boyfriend’s Teeth

45-year old Polish man Marek Olszewski showed up at his ex-girlfriend’s practice complaining of a toothache just days after he’d left her for another woman. He woke up to discover that all 32 of his teeth were suddenly gone.

Anna Machowiak, 34, told the Austrian Times“I tried to be professional and detach myself from my emotions. But when I saw him lying there I just thought, ‘What a bastard’ and decided to take all his teeth out.”

Machowiak reportedly locked the door and gave him a heavy dose of anesthesia. When he awoke, she put a bandage around his head so he couldn’t speak and told him there had been complications.  Continue reading “Scorned Polish Dentist Extracts All Her Ex-Boyfriend’s Teeth”

Deena Cortese Changed Her Face/Body

Deena Cortese, one half of “team meatball” and replacement to Angelina in season three of Jersey Shore looks very different lately.

She showed up at MTV’s Spring Break party and immediately sparked plastic surgery rumors.

Cortese had veneers put on her teeth and told Twitter followers that she changed her diet, thinned her eyebrows and improved her makeup skills.

“Just to let ya know..I have not got any plastic surgery yes in the past i have had a nose job and i am not against plastic surgery at all…I am not afraid to ADMIT i got plastic surgery so if I do, I’ll let u know.”

“I thinned my eyebrows and lost weight thanks to the @freshdiet and learned how to do my makeup. Lighter eye shadow brings out my eyes and highlight under my eyes gives an effect of higher cheek bones. The end.”

Nicki Minaj’s Tooth Decay And Pre-Fame Freestyle

Nicki Minaj showed her clean polished face off at the MAC Cosmetics Viva Glam Party in New York last week dressed like one of those delightful Starbucks is-it-cake-or-is-it-a-lollipop treats, however, something was off.

You guessed it, either there’s five popcorn hulls behind her tooth, she’s playing a trick on us OR she goes to the same neglectful dentist as Lindsay Lohan.

In old but recently discovered barbie snarl news, a retro video of Nicki freestyling hit the web yesterday. It’s about five years old and follows her as she wanders down the street sans makeup avec manicure.

Continue reading “Nicki Minaj’s Tooth Decay And Pre-Fame Freestyle”

Lindsay Got Her Teeth Fixed, Addictions Still Prevalent

After showing up to the Saint’s Row: The Third premiere a few weeks ago in L.A. with cavity-ridden teeth the color of what’d you find inside a campground Honey Bucket, we all wondered why Lindsay hadn’t paid to fix the damn things.

And guess what? She did fix them! She probably read my Lohan candy corn mouth article and realized that I was trying to tell her something.

She must have missed my other articles where I berated her for drinking like Tony Soprano and smoking more cigarettes than The Marlboro man, rest his soul.

Continue reading “Lindsay Got Her Teeth Fixed, Addictions Still Prevalent”

Lindsay Celebrates Halloween Early, With Candy Corn Teeth

*EMERGENCY ALERT SYSTEM WARNING: WE INTERRUPT YOUR PROGRAMMING TO BRING YOU AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE: LINDSAY LOHAN IS NEVER GOING TO BE NORMAL*

I don’t care if she wins an Oscar or a Grammy or craps golden eggs, she’s never gonna get back on track.

Here’s proof, Lindsay was out at Supperclub on Wednesday in Los Angeles for the premiere of Saint’s Row: The Third (Like Grand Theft Auto but with even less morals) walking down the red carpet, showing off her fucked up teeth

Continue reading “Lindsay Celebrates Halloween Early, With Candy Corn Teeth”

Celebs With Fucked Up Teeth

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As a fellow fucked-up teeth/tooth alumni, I admire celebrities (mostly) who can rock some slightly odd teeth.

I’m also a fan of at least half these people, especially Kristin Stewart, David Letterman, Mischa Barton, Freddie Mercury, Anna Paquin, Morgan Freeman and Keira Knightley…

But oi, I am not gonna ignore the fact that their teeth are a little sketchy. Regardless, rock that crooked grin, with your gaps, Chiclets, wolf teeth (Avril), or lack thereof!

[Show me your teeth]