TONIGHT, WE DINE IN HELL! Here’s a 12-Year-Old Singing Into a Turkey Leg

I really didn’t want to talk about this because it was released two weeks ago and there’s nothing I can say about it that everyone else didn’t already but, since it’s November twentyfoodth, I give you a song that is not close to my heart at all, “It’s Thanksgiving” by Nicole Westbrook.

She’s the new Rebecca Black, her microphone is a turkey leg and her song goes like this, “December was Christmas. January was New Year. April was Easter. And the 4th of July, but now it’s Thanksgiving. Oh oh oh it’s Thanksgiving. We we we we are gonna have a good time.”

Today we honor the day Pilgrims unsuccessfully tried to poison the last remaining American Indians…

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Turkish Woman Gets Revenge, Cuts Off Rapist’s Head

A pregnant woman who had been terrorized for months by her rapist finally got revenge.

After a man threatened to send naked photos to her mother and father and tell everyone about the rape unless she continued to have sex with him, the 26-year-old from Yalvac shot him 10 times in the penis, then cut off his head and tossed it in the center of town.

When the police arrived the “murderer” told them,

“That is the head of one who toyed with my honor.” During her testimony, she reportedly said yet another amazing thing:  Continue reading “Turkish Woman Gets Revenge, Cuts Off Rapist’s Head”

Celebrity Reactions To Madonna’s Pterodactyl Nip

Madonna flashed her nipple in Istanbul, Turkey, on June 7 while performing “Human Nature” and everyone seems to have their own opinion on the matter. Either she’s too old, desperate and gross or people are too uptight, and it’s no surprise.

I think there are no 53 year-old nipple anywhere in existence that I’m interested in seeing. And it is desperate, she’s a mom. That “Oops!..I Did It Again” face is as old as the mammary gland itself.

Here’s what a few fellow celebs had to say about Madonna’s MDNA tour stunt:

“There is nothing sexual about that titty and that shoulder. That’s an old titty…I guess she thinks it’s sexy…Looks like a beanbag with a nipple, that breast.”   -Howard Stern  Continue reading “Celebrity Reactions To Madonna’s Pterodactyl Nip”

Charlize Theron Is A Huge UFC fan, Travelled To Turkey For An Eclipse

Prometheus/Snow White and the Huntsman actress Charlize Theron‘s sit down with Conan aired Tuesday, June 5. She told him that she is “absolutely obsessed” with MMA.

“I lose my voice, I go that nuts. I get really into it. I mean, I think it’s such an incredible sport.”

“These guys are like incredible athletes and yet at the same time I wonder what it says about me that I like sweaty, hot men bleeding all over each other.”

She also described her love for astronomy and how she travelled to a special secluded spot in Turkey to see an eclipse that was interrupted by a woman singing “What’s Up” (aka “What’s Going On”) by 4 Non Blondes.  Continue reading “Charlize Theron Is A Huge UFC fan, Travelled To Turkey For An Eclipse”

LL Cool J Teaches The Ladies Of ‘The Talk’ The ‘Tandem Turkey Twist’

LL Cool J visited The Talk to discuss the Grammys, his recently deceased friend Heavy D and to teach the ladies some completely impractical turkey-related exercises to get their chair-formed arses a lift of mama-said-knock-you-out proportions.

Sara Gilbert refused to hold a turkey because she’s a vegan (Pshh I was a vegetarian for six years and I never pretended meat didn’t exist for other people) ANYWAY she held a pumpkin instead while Mr. Cool J had them “work their cores” by handing off birds while standing back to back.

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Naomi Campbell’s Birthday Present, An Eye Mansion

Yeah, no big deal, Naomi is turning 41 so her billionaire Ruski boyfriend, Vladislav Doronin, decided to build her an enormous “eco-mansion” in the shape of the Egyptian Eye of Horus.

It has around 25 rooms and five “lounges” and is said to be economically self-sufficient in its water, energy and food…

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