Stories I’m Too Lazy To Write About [8-10-12]

Zombie Disney princesses and Ronald McDonald. Enough said. (i09/Deviant Art)

Dwight Howard in a Lakers jersey. #$&%! (ShavarRoss)

Britney Spears looks hot again. But then again, I say that every year. (Starpulse)

Usain Bolt is a pretty decent photographer. (Yahoo!)

Fifty Shades Of Grey has a soundtrack now. (L.A. Times)

Some lady give birth in the park and Jonah Hill saw the whole thing. (TMZ)

The guy who sings “Big Girl (You Are Beautiful)” is gay. (Twitchy)

Kim Kardashian and her sisters put on glasses. Suddenly look really smart. (Gawker)

Monster energy drink stole 26 songs from the Beastie Boys. Beasties sue. (Spin)

Bourne series without Jason Bourne is weird. (Rolling Stone)

Seven Olympic athletes from Cameroon vanished into thin air (WebProNews)

Rihanna wasn’t as ghetto as Oprah thought she would be. (The Hollywood Gossip)

A woman is growing fingernails on her face and nobody knows why. (KTLA)

Drunk Mickey Rourke Beat Drunker Usain Bolt At A Foot Race

Who knows what Mickey Rourke was doing hanging out with three-time olympic gold medal winning sprinter Usain Bolt, let alone racing him. Turns out, it happened. From the mouth of Rourke himself, Yahoo Sports reports:

“We were outside the Wellington in Central London and it was four in the morning. It was just that time of the night, you know, when anything can happen.”

“So I went up to him and I said, ‘Come on, you are the world’s fastest man, let’s go. There was a space in the street of about 30 meters. I got him to back up about four paces, we set off and I got him by a few inches.”

Rourke, 59, called Bolt “cool” and “endearing” and said that he will be rooting for him in the upcoming London games. Rooting for him, and thinking about the time he whooped his ass…

The question is, did Usain let him win? Probably. But it’s the why that matters.  Continue reading “Drunk Mickey Rourke Beat Drunker Usain Bolt At A Foot Race”