Dog Takes Bikini-Clad Mariah Carey Out For a Walk

Mariah Carey bikini snowMariah Carey is in Aspen for Christmas and is fulfilling the ancient Anglo-Saxon tradition of walking one’s dog in just a bikini during snowy, 20-degree weather.

No seriously, this is a tradition. Instagram says so. America’s Got Talent is over, but I guess Nick Cannon found some other excuse to not pose next to her in a thin red banana hammock. We all know Mariah’s second-favorite thing after Christmas is shaming her husband.

She went so far as to call herself the female version of Will Ferrell’s character in Elf on Watch What Happens Live!

“I’m him, but the girl version of the character!” the “All I Want for Christmas Is You” singer said. “I’m like a five-year-old, I’m the kid still waiting for snow.”  Continue reading “Dog Takes Bikini-Clad Mariah Carey Out For a Walk”

AHOY! Kate Middleton’s Baby Bump Spotted Beneath Patterned Shawl

princess kate baby bumpDon’t you just get a kick out of how obsessed Americans are with Kate Middleton‘s baby? You know they’re all just pervs hoping for another William or Harry to gawk at (or a Diana, for the sake of Hollywood martyrdom).

The Princess is still a public figure, and her every waking move has become that much more scrutinized now that she’s pregnant. A walk around London turns into the resurrection of John Lennon. (I guess the Queen unshackled her following that whole morning sickness hospital trip/house arrest thing.)

One avid Duchess of Cambridge idolizer wrote: “Oh my gosh it makes me so excited for when the baby comes.” But why? I mean what are you planning to do with it? Toss her in a cell until she confesses!

Stories I’m Too Lazy To Write About [12-2-12]

Jennie Garth Luke Perry walk 2012
QUEUE THE 90210 THEME –  Jennie Garth and Luke Perry went on a walk. (E! Online)

Mario Lopez got married (not to Ryan Seacrest), here are some photos. (Celebuzz)

NME best songs list includes M.I.A., Grimes, Frank Ocean, Solange, and… Carly Rae? (NME)

Brandi Glanville still pissed that LeAnn Rimes stole her children. (Evil Beet)

Actual blurry image of Taylor Swift and One Direction’s Harry Styles in NYC exists. (ONTD!)

Lindsay Lohan says NO NO NO to rehab despite everyone’s best efforts. (TMZ)

Friend of Jovan Belcher says he was “immature,” had memory loss, alcoholic tendencies. (Deadspin)