Stories I’m Too Lazy To Write About [2-2-13]

Mariah Carey tube top winterWinter doesn’t care if you’re Mariah Carey/Mariah doesn’t care that it’s winter in NY. (Yahoo!)

Chris Brown cited for speeding, disappointingly “let go without incident.” (E! Online)

Someone photoshopped Taylor Swift’s head onto Miley Cyrus’ body. (ohmyGAHH!)

Amanda Bynes says she wasn’t evicted even though she probably was. (Evil Beet)

If Sylvester Stallone doesn’t need an assault rifle, you don’t either. (Huffington Post)

Jenny McCarthy sits in the bath talking about all the shows she wishes she was on. (Radar)

Fresh-out-of-the-ring Frank Ocean has a new bestest friend in sleazy John Mayer. (ONTD!)

Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Winter 2012 [Photos]

Are you a horny man and/or jealous woman? Look no further, I have just the thing for you. A gallery of photos from the gigantic bible of airbrushed swimsuit models, Sports Illustrated’s annual Swimsuit issue is out in all its shiny, international glory.

2012’s magazine features girls named Kirby, Bar and “Cintia Dicker” who are simultaneously getting revenge on all the grade/high school kids who made fun of their lanky bodies and strange names.

These girls visited Australia, Panama, Seychelles (in the Indian Ocean) the Gulf Coast of the United States and Zambia in Southern Africa.

So, if you notice a bunch of lions, elephants, giraffes and zebras chilling in the background, that’s why.  Continue reading “Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Winter 2012 [Photos]”