Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Winter 2012 [Photos]

Are you a horny man and/or jealous woman? Look no further, I have just the thing for you. A gallery of photos from the gigantic bible of airbrushed swimsuit models, Sports Illustrated’s annual Swimsuit issue is out in all its shiny, international glory.

2012’s magazine features girls named Kirby, Bar and “Cintia Dicker” who are simultaneously getting revenge on all the grade/high school kids who made fun of their lanky bodies and strange names.

These girls visited Australia, Panama, Seychelles (in the Indian Ocean) the Gulf Coast of the United States and Zambia in Southern Africa.

So, if you notice a bunch of lions, elephants, giraffes and zebras chilling in the background, that’s why. 

To help fulfill those people who can’t wait for the next ESPN Body Issue, they’ve included three male athletes in the mix. Spanish Tennis star Rafael Nadal, Olympic gold medalist Michael Phelps and Chris Paul of the Los Angeles Clippers all posing with Leo DiCaprio’s ex, Bar Refaeli.

Acquiring these pictures was no easy task. So I want to thank the Sports Illustrated website for purposefully including only variations of photos from the actual magazine plus making them GIGANTIC so they’re extra hard to steal.

Oh one more thing, congrats to the company Bristol Six and their “Nippies Swim Line” for dressing Refaeli’s and SI covergirl/Victoria’s Secret catalog girl Kate Upton, who, by the way, some are calling too fat to be awarded such honors.

I say god bless her and Clint Eastwood for representing Michigan (in a red Maggie May/Magdelana Trevers suit) so well. But thanks Clint, for not being in a bikini even though they woulda Photochopped your nipples like they did everyone else’s. Love you.