Octomom’s In Rehab For a Wacky Xanax Addiction

Nadya Suleman has a Xanax addiction and is paying for a stint in rehab with the money she made on her solo porn, you know, the one her oldest son Elijah watched on his phone all casual like it was an extra apocalyptic director’s cut of Prometheus.

Octomom checked into Chapman House Drug Rehabilitation Center in SoCal, dividing her 14 churrens and handing them out to three desperate nannies and two drama-seeking friends (you are who you hang with).

“Nadya wanted to get off the Xanax she was prescribed by her doctor and learn to deal with her stress, exhaustion and anxiety with professional help with a team of doctors,” Her rep said in a statement.

Is anyone not surprised or worried that she was taking anti-anxiety medication? 

That’s what you do when your bellybutton turns into Voldemort’s nostrils and your breasts drag behind you like the custom train on an Alexander McQueen wedding dress.

Read: Octomom’s Babysitters – It’s Easier When She’s Gone

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