Lindsay Lohan‘s new, extra-incompetent representative and proud graduate of Mickey’s Offbrand Toontown Law School in Disneyland Bratislava reportedly told the press that his client was on her way to a New York school for autistic children.
Withered lawyer potato Mark Heller would not disclose the name of the school or the exact location, so there’s no way for us to fly to the East Coast and intercept her attempts to corrupt and frighten developmentally disabled kids with her venomous words and facial creases.
They’re autistic, not deaf and blind. What school would even allow Lindsay Lohan to enter their premises?
She’s like the one girl who lived through Final Destination. It’s just safer not to get too close.
I foresee Dina driving a school bus through the gym wall while Lindsay slurs through a pre-written lecture about driving drunk while balancing a cigarette on your stolen jewelry and purse full of cocaine.
The Twist Gossip 