Me: The new songs uhhh so good!
Him: You two should have lesbo kids!
Me: I would totally have lesbo kids with her any day any time
Him: P (:)
Me: I’ll throw her in a burlap sack full of crumpets
Me: And impregnate her with copies of Downton Abbey
So, bad British stereotypes aside, Ellie was weirdly not asked to perform at the VMAs because she’s just too talented for Miley’s steamy foam herpes finger. (Fortunately “twerk” was added to the dictionary and it’s a great Scrabble word.) BUT there is this pre-VMA video of Taylor Swift and her at Staples Center.
Swifty introduced Goulding as one of her “favorite” artists and also her friend. Awwwww.