Chris Brown Headed To Rehab… For Anger

chris brown in court d.c.After having his felony assault charges against a D.C. man reduced to a misdemeanor, Chris Brown has checked into a rehab center in Malibu to help get his temper under control.

Did I say to get his temper under control? I meant to make people think he’s an imperfect person who can improve after a little counseling and yoga under palm trees.

Great publicity move, but anyone with a fraction of a brain cell knows that Chris Brown isn’t a circumstantial dickhead, he’s a no-hope toolshed full of dildos who miraculously avoids jail time by blinding people with his sh*tty imitation Usher bull honky. 

A source for E! News hints that he isn’t going to rehab merely for anger management, but also because of a reliance on weed and alcohol. Those glasses aren’t fooling anyone…

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