Amanda Bynes is Still Crazy and High as F*ck, Apparently

Amanda Bynes band aid faceAmanda Bynes is back at it! NY Daily News and TMZ have a video of Bynes doing a bizarre dance in front of her driver at a snooty clothing store on Wednesday before moving on to another snooty clothing store (Barney’s) to get a five-finger discount on a hat.

I repeat, “bizarre dance in front of her DRIVER,” which means she’s moved on from DUIs to petty theft!

Reports suggest that Amanda’s love for weed is to blame, as she was kicked out of fashion school for laughing out loud for no reason and was also seen “visibly high” and “painting her face with excessive amounts of makeup” at a restaurant. She also talks to trees. 

Fortunately for us, her bizarre dance occurred in front of multiple eyewitnesses:

Over the next few minutes, she throws on the white shirt, takes off her bra, strums an air guitar and dances wildly around the store.

“It was insane,” one store employee said.

At one point, a sales associate asked Bynes if she’s planning on purchasing the white blouse that she still had on as she pranced around the store.

“Do I really have to buy this?” she replied.

While I’m proud of Amanda for not drunk driving (it’s all about the baby steps), I’ve had it with bored, rail-thin rich white girls who have nothing better to do than shoplift and stuff pumpkin spice tampons up their hip-hop influenced vaginas.
Amanda bynes shopliftingIt’s time for Obama to outsource Miley and Amanda to Alaska where there’s almost nothing to twerk on besides hungry polar bears and Sarah Palin’s family members.

Let them get mistaken for wildlife and take a few bullets, but save the volunteering with Ebola patients for Justin Bieber and Chris Brown.

Nothing like an exit wound to remind you you’re human and help you understand the true meaning of the word “gangster.”

Read: Amanda Bynes Auditioning For Wax Museum Porn?

Read: Amanda Bynes Smokes A Pipe, Talks To Herself

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