Lindsay Lohan Has Bruises All Over Her Legs

Lindsay Lohan bruisesWhile taking a dip in the waters of Brazil, Lindsay Lohan displayed some pretty large, above-the-knee bruises.

Let me explain this, in case you forgot what happens to your pain tolerance when you get sloshed on jungle juice… Drunk bitches fall hard because they don’t feel it.

Alcohol may ruin your vision, motor skills, and equilibrium, but it also turns you into Hulk, and Lindsay is no exception. Close your mouths and stop imagining that she’s being abused by Avi Snow or Max George or whoever she’s supposed to be dating now.

UNLESS one of them pushed her down the stairs without knowing that her “I’m pregnant” Tweet was a late April Fool’s joke. Here are some other photos of past and present damage: Continue reading “Lindsay Lohan Has Bruises All Over Her Legs”

The Closest Thing You’ll See To A Justin Bieber Hate Crime

For Complex Magazine’s 10th anniversary issue they put Justin Bieber on the cover, no big thang there besides the fact that he’s covered in blood, bruises and steak meat.

Whether the people behind this hate him, want attention or truly think this is artistic doesn’t matter to me. It’s Justin Bieber, beat to a pulp. It’s not real but a girl can dream. Their excuse?

“Pop stardom is a contact sport, but at age 18 Justin Bieber knows how to roll with the punches. Believe that.” Hmm, doesn’t look like he’s good at rolling with anything except letting his assistant slide his tiny legs through a pair of loose purple jeans.  Continue reading “The Closest Thing You’ll See To A Justin Bieber Hate Crime”

Poor Steven Tyler, Fell, Got Back Up, Turned Into Gollum

According to a study conducted at University of Michigan, a third of people age 60 and older have difficulty getting in and out of the bath or shower, even with safety equipment installed.

Do you know how old American Idol/Aerosmith frontlady Steven Tyler is? 63. So of course I believe him when he says that he hasn’t fallen off the wagon. He wasn’t drunk or high when he fell in the shower, he’s just old and frail, like Gollum.

Continue reading “Poor Steven Tyler, Fell, Got Back Up, Turned Into Gollum”

Glee’s Heather Morris’ Black Eye Photos

Everybody’s favorite ditzy TV cheerleader has been photographed by controversial photographer Tyler Shields for his website. She is depicted with a very visible black eye, for no apparent reason.

The pictures of Glee’s Heather Morris are getting negative attention from various sources included the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.

Shields told E!,

“In no way were we promoting domestic violence. We wanted to do a bruised-up Barbie shoot and that’s exactly what we did!”

Continue reading “Glee’s Heather Morris’ Black Eye Photos”