Orlando Bloom and Selena Gomez: So Guilty it’s Hilarious

Selena gomez orlando bloom sneaking outSelena Gomez and Orlando Bloom are quite possibly exchanging bodily fluids, and the proof is in this photo. Reportedly of the pair leaving one of Chelsea Handler’s stand-up shows and judging facial expressions only, the photo clearly depicts two very specific types of guilt.

Nearly 40-year-old Orlando is guilty of hooking up with someone who is 21 but looks 12, and Selena just found out the hard way that British men aren’t circumcised.

In that jacket, with those eyes he also kind of looks like a rapey magician. Correction: rapey uncircumcised magician.

TMZ thinks they’re revenge f*cking to get back at Miranda Kerr and Justin Bieber for leaning against each other for 5 seconds as a fashion show four years ago. Not far-fetched at all.

Welcome To The Jungle, Lana Del Rey

It’s quite possible that Lana Del Rey took off her Blue Jeans for Axl Rose.

The two were photographed (and videoed) leaving Chateau Marmont hotel together on Friday.

Daily Mail reports that Lana was seen at two Guns N’ Roses concerts last month. She also has a song called “Axl Rose Husband.”

Rose is 25 years her senior, but this story somehow doesn’t surprise me as much as it should.

I think, like her songs, this is an ironic move. She’s always singing about money, tattoos, fame, and rock ‘n’ roll.

It doesn’t get more…any of those things, than Axl Rose, does it?

Continue reading “Welcome To The Jungle, Lana Del Rey”