Measles Outbreak Linked to Idiot Parents

Measles meme The hot new thing right now is measles, a child-killing virus and rash that wasn’t much of a problem developed countries like the U.S. since widespread use of the vaccine in 2000. In 2004, there were only 37 cases, but in 2014 there were at least 644 confirmed cases in the states and many think that Jenny McCarthy the popular anti-vaccine movement is to blame.

If certain parents weren’t opposed to vaccinating their children there would likely be no outbreak in California or a rise in cases in general.  Continue reading “Measles Outbreak Linked to Idiot Parents”

This LEGO Memo is a Must-Read for all Parents

lego message to parentsIn 1974, LEGO included this message to parents with their sets, urging them to encourage creativity and disregard gender roles not only when it comes to toys, but in life as well.

The urge to create is equally strong in all children. Boys and girls. It’s imagination that counts. Not skill. You build whatever comes into your head, the way you want it. A bed or a truck. A dolls house or a spaceship. A lot of boys like dolls houses. They’re more human than spaceships. A lot of girls prefer spaceships. They’re more exciting than dolls houses. The most important thing is to put the right material in their hands and let them create whatever appeals to them.

Continue reading “This LEGO Memo is a Must-Read for all Parents”

Amanda Bynes Frolics in Bikini, Makes Long-Awaited Return to Twitter!

Amanda Bynes bikini 2014
Amanda Bynes MAY be giving us the success story we wasted our time hoping for with Lindsay Lohan…

After entering a hospital and eventually rehab for driving crazily, smashing bongs and lighting fires in people’s yards, Bynes is seemingly back to her content, sane self – spending time with her parents and attending the Fashion Institute of Design & Merchandising.

Of all the negative things Bynes was “famous” for in recent years, most know her for her presence on Twitter.

Once the queen of attention-grabbing tweets that often involved calling people “ugly” and getting her vagina murdered, not to mention the posting of one-eyed duckface photos, Amanda B. has quietly returned to social media with short and sweet messages about her fans and her birthday. (She just turned 28.)  Continue reading “Amanda Bynes Frolics in Bikini, Makes Long-Awaited Return to Twitter!”

Miley Cyrus Put a Fan’s Dirty Thong in Her Mouth

Miley Cyrus used thongEveryone’s talking about Miley Cyrus‘ Bangerz tour, where she simulates masturbation and blowies to a man in a Bill Clinton mask while wearing an assortment of flapjack-exposing leotards.

According to HuffPo, after a fan threw their thong on the stage, Miley picked it up and put it in her mouth.

Parents of young fans who have been attending these concerts seem oddly surprised that these types of antics are occurring. Parents who are apparently too busy micromanaging kiddie lemonade stands and soccer meets to know that Miley Cyrus hasn’t been a good role model since, well, ever, with that IQ, but especially not since she went full retard with a bowl haircut and knocked a bunch of twerking dwarves over with wrecking balls.  Continue reading “Miley Cyrus Put a Fan’s Dirty Thong in Her Mouth”

Lady Gaga Is Rooting For The Giants, Parent’s Restaurant Sucks

Mrs. Ra Ra, who has been seen at Giants games watering the stands with champagne and Tweeting things like “Giants fan but wow. #Tebow that’s what the fuck a champion looks like” had her photo taken by the glorious Terry Richardson for the millionth time.

Richardson wrote the caption “Lady Gaga holding a football… Go Giants!”

News for Gaga includes this obvious nonsense, that she’s from New York and not voting for the Pats but also that her dad’s restaurant, ‘Joanne Trattoria,’ opened.

Menu items include Papa Joe’s Chicken and Grandma Ronnie’s Meatballs. “Grandma Ronnie” is, by the way, my favorite name ever. I’m going to call one of my nerdy Avernum: Escape From The Pit characters that.  Continue reading “Lady Gaga Is Rooting For The Giants, Parent’s Restaurant Sucks”